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IRELAND - the only place where...................

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    IRELAND - the only place where...................

    • When you were young, you went to bed when Glenroe was over,
    • If you die from alcohol poisoning, you're considered a lightweight,
    • '**** off' means 'Are you serious?', ... ...
    • The person that you insult most is probably your best friend,
    • Saying 'I will yea' means that you definitely won't,
    • '**** it, it's grand' means that you couldn't be bothered to finish it properly,
    • 'He's fond of a drink' means he suffers from severe life-threatening alcoholism,
    • Saying you're going for a drink means you might not be seen again for 3 days,
    • Crisps are called 'Taytos' and fizzy drinks are called 'minerals',
    • 'For the craic' is the best reason for doing anything,
    • The best cure for a hangover is more drink,
    • Nobody can go a day without saying 'Jaysus',
    • 'Meeting' has a double meaning,
    • Tea is the solution to every problem,
    • And water is the solution to every GAA injury,
    • 'I got stuck behind a tractor' is a perfectly valid reason for being late,
    • We eat Tayto sandwiches for lunch, and ham sandwiches on the way to Croke Park,
    • You can insert the name of a gardening tool into any sentence and it still makes sense, e.g. 'I had a rake of drink last night' or 'I'll be out in a minute, I'm just shoveling down the dinner',
    • GAA is considered religion,
    • It's perfectly acceptable to call your mother 'mammy' even though you are a fully grown adult,
    • Saying 'Now we're sucking diesel' means that you are happy with the outcome of the situation,
    • You're scared of the wooden spoon,
    • You can say 'Any craic' to a garda and you won't get arrested,
    • 'The dogs' bollocks' means something is brilliant.
    Nope, don't need anger management, you just need to stop pissing me off!
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