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Old 27-09-15, 10:07 PM   #2521
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i know its your site and stuff but you should really consider giving yourself a week in the sin bin just to send a message and prevent anyone else trying shit like that.
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Old 28-09-15, 09:37 AM   #2522
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i know its your site and stuff but you should really consider giving yourself a week in the sin bin just to send a message and prevent anyone else trying shit like that.


I thought it was quite good ftr
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Old 03-10-15, 04:47 PM   #2523
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Nothing for days??

Might have posted this before but....

What's the difference between Fatima Whitbreads cunt and a snooker ball?

You'd eat a snooker ball if you had to!
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Old 02-03-16, 11:27 PM   #2524
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Why did the frog die?


He Kermit suicide.
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Klopp on LFC vs MUFC (March 9th 2016) - "This is why I love football. This is why we watched it when we were young. I can still not have enough of it."


Always, keep your face to the sun, and shadows will fall behind you.
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Old 02-03-16, 11:28 PM   #2525
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What did the ceiling say to the floor?

I'll meet you at the corner.
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Klopp on LFC vs MUFC (March 9th 2016) - "This is why I love football. This is why we watched it when we were young. I can still not have enough of it."


Always, keep your face to the sun, and shadows will fall behind you.
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Old 02-03-16, 11:29 PM   #2526
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Why did the scarecrow get promoted?

He was outstanding in his field.
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Klopp on LFC vs MUFC (March 9th 2016) - "This is why I love football. This is why we watched it when we were young. I can still not have enough of it."


Always, keep your face to the sun, and shadows will fall behind you.
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Old 03-03-16, 12:04 AM   #2527
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Slinky Skills View Post
What did the ceiling say to the floor?

I'll meet you at the corner.
That's where they meet the walls, not each other.

Anyway this thread is for jokes in bad/poor taste
Not bad or poor jokes!
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Old 03-03-16, 08:45 AM   #2528
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A man rings a vets surgery and says
"you've got to come to see my dog, he's swallowed a condom!! It's an emergency!!"
The vet says "il finish up what I'm doing and be there in one hour!"
The man rings back 10 minutes later and says to the vet "don't worry about coming now, panic over!"
The vet says "how come? "
The man says "I found another one in the draw"!!!
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Old 07-03-16, 02:03 AM   #2529
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Old 10-04-16, 08:36 PM   #2530
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Stolen from a friends Facebook...

Leicester will be in the Champions League next season.......

UEFA tend to gift-aid football shirts of the representative teams to children in underprivileged countries.... There could be children in Africa walking around in Leicester shirts......

Imagine..... Children without Water, walking around with 'Drinkwater' on their shirts
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Old 10-04-16, 10:23 PM   #2531
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I went to the doctors with hearing problems.

He said "Can u describe the symptoms?"

I said "Homers a fat bloke and Marge has blue hair"
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Klopp on LFC vs MUFC (March 9th 2016) - "This is why I love football. This is why we watched it when we were young. I can still not have enough of it."


Always, keep your face to the sun, and shadows will fall behind you.
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Old 07-06-16, 09:23 PM   #2532
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I just ordered a chicken and an egg off Amazon.

I'll let you know...
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Old 08-06-16, 12:09 PM   #2533
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Slinky Skills View Post
I went to the doctors with hearing problems.

He said "Can u describe the symptoms?"

I said "Homers a fat bloke and Marge has blue hair"
"& a little cunt called Bart!" to finish that off!
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Old 08-06-16, 06:11 PM   #2534
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The other fishermen hate him, you'll never guess the one strange item he uses to catch more fish than anyone else...

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Old 19-06-16, 12:46 PM   #2535
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I used to be a necrophiliac until some rotten cunt split on me.
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Old 22-06-16, 08:33 PM   #2536
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I used to be a sadist and necrophiliac with a touch of bestiality. Gave that up as it was like flogging a dead horse
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Old 23-06-16, 10:59 AM   #2537
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Angryred View Post
"& a little cunt called Bart!" to finish that off!
What.

Quote:
Originally Posted by RoadEnd View Post
I used to be a sadist and necrophiliac with a touch of bestiality. Gave that up as it was like flogging a dead horse


Oh and Gibbo.
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Old 24-06-16, 12:57 PM   #2538
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Talking

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lee View Post
What.





Oh and Gibbo.
Lee, never mind that...had a brain fart that day!
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Old 09-08-16, 04:10 PM   #2539
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What do you call a snobbish criminal going down the stairs?


A condescending con descending. ;-)
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Old 14-09-16, 11:21 PM   #2540
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Quote:
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My Grandad just said to me "Liverpool are shite this year lad." I said "tell me something I don't know grandad.
He replied "your Nana's arse can take my whole fist!"
Told this in the pub tonight. Jaws dropped
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Old 21-12-16, 02:09 AM   #2541
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Quote:
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What do you call a snobbish criminal going down the stairs?


A condescending con descending. ;-)
Clever
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Old 21-12-16, 12:43 PM   #2542
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After seven years of medical training and hard work, my very good friend has been struck off after one minor indiscretion, and I think it's outrageous.

He slept with one of his patients, and now can no longer work in the profession that he loves.
What a waste of time, training and money.

A genuinely nice guy, and a brilliant vet...
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Old 23-12-16, 04:22 AM   #2543
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Quote:
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After seven years of medical training and hard work, my very good friend has been struck off after one minor indiscretion, and I think it's outrageous.



He slept with one of his patients, and now can no longer work in the profession that he loves.

What a waste of time, training and money.



A genuinely nice guy, and a brilliant vet...


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Old 22-01-17, 07:15 PM   #2544
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My pet mouse Elvis died today.

He was caught in a trap....
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Old 23-01-17, 03:34 PM   #2545
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My pet mouse Elvis died today.

He was caught in a trap....
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Old 24-01-17, 09:30 AM   #2546
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That were absolute diabolical
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Old 24-01-17, 01:33 PM   #2547
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Old 24-01-17, 01:52 PM   #2548
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Funniest thing I've heard in ages
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Old 24-01-17, 06:26 PM   #2549
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Had me absolutely in tears
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That were absolute diabolical
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Old 27-01-17, 12:39 PM   #2550
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qUQMYumUgYI#t=2m57s
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Old 31-01-17, 06:57 PM   #2551
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Quote:
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brilliant!!
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Old 09-02-17, 10:13 AM   #2552
RoadEnd
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Clubbers in Leeds have taken to using dental syringes to inject liquid Ecstacy directly into their mouths.


This dangerous process is known as 'E by Gum
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Old 10-02-17, 11:43 AM   #2553
cadmium
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Saw a beautiful Thai woman on the train today and kept thinking, don't get an erection, don't get an erection, don't get an erection, but then she did.
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Old 10-02-17, 12:25 PM   #2554
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I shouldn't, that's terrible, but
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Old 28-02-17, 10:05 AM   #2555
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I rolled a joint using a page from the Koran yesterday - Boy! did I get stoned.
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Old 27-04-17, 06:30 AM   #2556
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Did you hear about the Japanese car thief?

Tommy Tukamota
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Old 29-04-17, 07:05 AM   #2557
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Did you hear about the Japanese car thief?

Tommy Tukamota
not bad that!!
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Old 29-04-17, 09:09 AM   #2558
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not bad that!!
What about the Chinese fence manufacturer

Ray Ling
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Old 30-04-17, 09:07 AM   #2559
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Or the Indian butler, Mahatma Coat.
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Old 01-05-17, 05:28 PM   #2560
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Edit
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Klopp on LFC vs MUFC (March 9th 2016) - "This is why I love football. This is why we watched it when we were young. I can still not have enough of it."


Always, keep your face to the sun, and shadows will fall behind you.

Last edited by Slinky Skills; 01-05-17 at 05:34 PM.
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