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Old 18-08-08, 07:35 AM   #1
Elvoz
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NSFW Poor/Bad Taste Jokes

is there a section or talk of making one

cheers in advance

Last edited by Elvoz; 18-08-08 at 11:53 AM.
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Old 18-08-08, 10:40 AM   #2
bobbyfallon
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na mate - they dont go down well with everyone... i posted a few and well it didnt go down well. pm me a few though
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"Sky and Setanta have the right to choose their games and it will be the same for everyone. So Mr Ferguson will not be complaining about fixtures and a campaign against United.

"Or there is another option. That Mr Ferguson organises the fixtures in his office and sends it to us and everyone will know and cannot complain. That is simple."
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Old 18-08-08, 10:47 AM   #3
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What's black and eats pussy?

Cervical Cancer.
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Old 18-08-08, 11:40 AM   #4
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What's black and eats pussy?

Cervical Cancer.




















.....






.........
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Old 18-08-08, 11:41 AM   #5
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what makes 9 out of ten people happy ???

gang rape
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"Sky and Setanta have the right to choose their games and it will be the same for everyone. So Mr Ferguson will not be complaining about fixtures and a campaign against United.

"Or there is another option. That Mr Ferguson organises the fixtures in his office and sends it to us and everyone will know and cannot complain. That is simple."
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Old 18-08-08, 11:43 AM   #6
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Whats the smartest things to ever come out of a womans mouth?

Einsteins cock.

What kind of file do you need to turn a 15mm hole into a 40mm hole?

A pedophile
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Old 18-08-08, 11:43 AM   #7
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Whats funnier than a dead baby.

A dead baby in a clowns suit.
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Old 18-08-08, 11:44 AM   #8
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Whats better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics?


ICE CREAMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!!
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Old 18-08-08, 11:45 AM   #9
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What's the biggest cause of paedophilia in the UK?
Sexy Kids


What's the best thing about 28 year olds?
There's 20 of them
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Old 18-08-08, 11:45 AM   #10
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id say you will be getting a pm sharpish. funny though
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"Sky and Setanta have the right to choose their games and it will be the same for everyone. So Mr Ferguson will not be complaining about fixtures and a campaign against United.

"Or there is another option. That Mr Ferguson organises the fixtures in his office and sends it to us and everyone will know and cannot complain. That is simple."
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Old 18-08-08, 11:46 AM   #11
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How do you get a baby out of the blender?

Nachos.
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Old 18-08-08, 11:46 AM   #12
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If anyone is offended don't come in the thread. Simple.
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Old 18-08-08, 11:48 AM   #13
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Why did the girl fall off the swing?

She had no arms
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Old 18-08-08, 11:48 AM   #14
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Quote:
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If anyone is offended don't come in the thread. Simple.
you would think wouldnt you
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"Sky and Setanta have the right to choose their games and it will be the same for everyone. So Mr Ferguson will not be complaining about fixtures and a campaign against United.

"Or there is another option. That Mr Ferguson organises the fixtures in his office and sends it to us and everyone will know and cannot complain. That is simple."
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Old 18-08-08, 11:52 AM   #15
Elvoz
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i was watching the olympics yesterday and i thought to myself

fuck is there anything these chinese arent good at ?


then i remembered







picking cockles in morecombe bay
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Old 18-08-08, 11:54 AM   #16
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Whats the difference between a priest and acne?

acne waits until you're a teenager to come on your face
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Old 18-08-08, 11:54 AM   #17
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all of u are banned!











Q: What is the difference between a Catholic priest and acne?
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Old 18-08-08, 11:54 AM   #18
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Q: What has 4 legs and one arm?
A: A Doberman in a playground
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Old 18-08-08, 11:55 AM   #19
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haha timing of that!
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Old 18-08-08, 11:55 AM   #20
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Too late dude.
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Old 18-08-08, 11:55 AM   #21
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Quote:
Originally Posted by elvoz View Post
i was watching the olympics yesterday and i thought to myself

fuck is there anything these chinese arent good at ?


then i remembered







picking cockles in morecombe bay











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Old 18-08-08, 11:56 AM   #22
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might wanna put NSFW or 18 on this thread....sickly funny though
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Old 18-08-08, 11:56 AM   #23
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Whats the best thing about punching a transexual in the face?

You get all of the pleasure of hitting a woman and none of the guilt.
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Old 18-08-08, 11:57 AM   #24
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Woke up in bed yesterday with a dead terrorist beside me with his dick up my arse.

I called the police and they said I'd been the victim of a suicide bummer.
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Old 18-08-08, 11:57 AM   #25
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Whats black and sits at the top of the stairs?

Stephen Hawking in a house fire.
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Old 18-08-08, 11:58 AM   #26
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BFG View Post
Woke up in bed yesterday with a dead terrorist beside me with his dick up my arse.

I called the police and they said I'd been the victim of a suicide bummer.
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Old 18-08-08, 11:59 AM   #27
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Q. What do a Priest and a Pint of Guinness have in common?

A. A bad one will tear the arse out of you.
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Old 18-08-08, 11:59 AM   #28
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whats red and found in a dark corner at Harry Ramsdens ?

abortion of chips




whats the height of cruelty ?

telling a thalidomide what a wank is
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Old 18-08-08, 11:59 AM   #29
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddy View Post
Whats black and sits at the top of the stairs?

Stephen Hawking in a house fire.
Fucking funny.
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Old 18-08-08, 12:00 PM   #30
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What's red, sticky, and crawls up your leg?

Homesick Abortion
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Old 18-08-08, 12:00 PM   #31
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i shall put a warning on the thread - but guarenteed that will only attract people to come in and critisice and have a go etc - we would be better off giving it a random 'code' name like "Peter Kay Jokes" then noone would ever check
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Old 18-08-08, 12:01 PM   #32
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Hahaha....

I await the PC brigade.
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Old 18-08-08, 12:03 PM   #33
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Two gay blokes are at home naked and one says to the other, "Don't start until I get back from the toilet". He goes to the toilet, comes back and there is semen on the floor. He yells, "Oh my god, you already started" to which his boyfriend replies, "No I didn't, I just farted"
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Old 18-08-08, 12:05 PM   #34
Elvoz
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I keep having my profile on that dating website 'Match.com' rejected.
One of the questions is, 'What do you want in a woman?'.
Apparently 'my dick' is not an acceptable answer.

Two men in a pub and one is riding a Bucking Bronco Machine. He lasts over 10 minutes.
'Crikey mate, that was impressive!'
'I get lots of practice' replied the other guy. 'My wifes epileptic'
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Old 18-08-08, 12:05 PM   #35
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Q: What's the difference between Santa Claus and a Jew?
A: Santa Claus goes down the chimney.
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Old 18-08-08, 12:08 PM   #36
bobbyfallon
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maura hindley is walking across the moores on a dark misty night with a wee girl holding her hand.....

the girl looks up into mauras face - "im scared" she says.....

"your scared, i have to walk back on my own"
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"Sky and Setanta have the right to choose their games and it will be the same for everyone. So Mr Ferguson will not be complaining about fixtures and a campaign against United.

"Or there is another option. That Mr Ferguson organises the fixtures in his office and sends it to us and everyone will know and cannot complain. That is simple."
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Old 18-08-08, 12:08 PM   #37
Elvoz
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whats better than winning a gold medal in the Paralympics?

Not being handicapped.
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Old 18-08-08, 12:17 PM   #38
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Winston is a five year old Nigerian boy

Despite having only one leg, he has to pedal his bike 15 miles every day to get to school

His bike doesn't have tyres and the one working pedal is on the wrong side for him

Please send just 2.50 so you can receive the video, its funny as fuck
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Old 18-08-08, 02:03 PM   #39
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Apparently dogshit can make children blind.

Surely poking your fingers in their eyes would be a better option.
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Through me the way to the eternal pain,
Through me the way that runs among the lost.
Justice urged on my high artificer;
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The highest wisdom, and the primal love.
Before me nothing but eternal things were made,
And I endure eternally.
Abandon every hope, ye who enter here."
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Old 18-08-08, 02:07 PM   #40
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I got a sweater for my birthday


Pissed me off no end.. I really wanted a screamer or a moaner.
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"Through me the way into the suffering city,
Through me the way to the eternal pain,
Through me the way that runs among the lost.
Justice urged on my high artificer;
My maker was divine authority,
The highest wisdom, and the primal love.
Before me nothing but eternal things were made,
And I endure eternally.
Abandon every hope, ye who enter here."
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