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Crap Jokes
18-08-08, 10:40 AM
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#2 |
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Est's Frank Spencer
Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 5,040
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na mate - they dont go down well with everyone... i posted a few and well it didnt go down well. pm me a few though
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"Sky and Setanta have the right to choose their games and it will be the same for everyone. So Mr Ferguson will not be complaining about fixtures and a campaign against United. "Or there is another option. That Mr Ferguson organises the fixtures in his office and sends it to us and everyone will know and cannot complain. That is simple." 
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18-08-08, 10:47 AM
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#3 |
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Out Patient
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 3,151
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What's black and eats pussy?
Cervical Cancer. |
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18-08-08, 11:40 AM
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#4 | |
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George Soros
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 14,653
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Quote:
 .....  ......... 
__________________
Cheers Subby www.subbytech.com - Use your "est" discount code to get 15% off everything in the store too MetalliGear Neo Qube : Ryzen 5900x : Gigabyte x570 Aorus Elite : 32GB Vengence 3600Mhz : Sabrent Gen 4 NVME SSD : RX580 : MasterLiquid 360 : 850w G2 : CableMod custom cables : Win 10 |
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18-08-08, 11:41 AM
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#5 |
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Est's Frank Spencer
Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 5,040
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what makes 9 out of ten people happy ???
gang rape
__________________
"Sky and Setanta have the right to choose their games and it will be the same for everyone. So Mr Ferguson will not be complaining about fixtures and a campaign against United. "Or there is another option. That Mr Ferguson organises the fixtures in his office and sends it to us and everyone will know and cannot complain. That is simple."
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18-08-08, 11:43 AM
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#6 |
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Out Patient
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 3,151
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Whats the smartest things to ever come out of a womans mouth?
Einsteins cock. What kind of file do you need to turn a 15mm hole into a 40mm hole? A pedophile |
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18-08-08, 11:43 AM
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#7 |
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Out Patient
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 3,151
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Whats funnier than a dead baby.
A dead baby in a clowns suit. |
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18-08-08, 11:45 AM
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#8 |
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Dalglish
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 4,510
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What's the biggest cause of paedophilia in the UK?
Sexy Kids What's the best thing about 28 year olds? There's 20 of them
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"My commitment to Liverpool is 100 per cent. I would die for that Liverpool shirt. I think the club loves me and I feel the same, no matter what the situation." - Pepe Reina, Nov '09. |
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18-08-08, 11:44 AM
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#9 |
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Out Patient
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 3,151
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Whats better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics?
ICE CREAMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!! |
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18-08-08, 11:45 AM
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#10 |
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Est's Frank Spencer
Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 5,040
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id say you will be getting a pm sharpish. funny though
__________________
"Sky and Setanta have the right to choose their games and it will be the same for everyone. So Mr Ferguson will not be complaining about fixtures and a campaign against United. "Or there is another option. That Mr Ferguson organises the fixtures in his office and sends it to us and everyone will know and cannot complain. That is simple."
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18-08-08, 11:46 AM
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#11 |
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Out Patient
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 3,151
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How do you get a baby out of the blender?
Nachos. |
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18-08-08, 11:46 AM
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#12 |
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Out Patient
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 3,151
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If anyone is offended don't come in the thread. Simple.
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18-08-08, 11:48 AM
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#13 | |
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Est's Frank Spencer
Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 5,040
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Quote:
__________________
"Sky and Setanta have the right to choose their games and it will be the same for everyone. So Mr Ferguson will not be complaining about fixtures and a campaign against United. "Or there is another option. That Mr Ferguson organises the fixtures in his office and sends it to us and everyone will know and cannot complain. That is simple."
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18-08-08, 11:52 AM
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#14 |
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Baron Münchhausen
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 4,634
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i was watching the olympics yesterday and i thought to myself
fuck is there anything these chinese arent good at ? then i remembered picking cockles in morecombe bay |
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18-08-08, 11:55 AM
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#15 | |
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George Soros
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 14,653
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Quote:
__________________
Cheers Subby www.subbytech.com - Use your "est" discount code to get 15% off everything in the store too MetalliGear Neo Qube : Ryzen 5900x : Gigabyte x570 Aorus Elite : 32GB Vengence 3600Mhz : Sabrent Gen 4 NVME SSD : RX580 : MasterLiquid 360 : 850w G2 : CableMod custom cables : Win 10 |
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18-08-08, 11:57 AM
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#16 |
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Dalglish
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 4,510
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Woke up in bed yesterday with a dead terrorist beside me with his dick up my arse.
I called the police and they said I'd been the victim of a suicide bummer.
__________________
"My commitment to Liverpool is 100 per cent. I would die for that Liverpool shirt. I think the club loves me and I feel the same, no matter what the situation." - Pepe Reina, Nov '09. |
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18-08-08, 11:59 AM
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#17 |
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Fagan
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 1,989
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whats red and found in a dark corner at Harry Ramsdens ?
abortion of chips whats the height of cruelty ? telling a thalidomide what a wank is
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Keep this quiet  if you carefully grind off the edges of a 50p coin you can use it as a 10p |
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18-08-08, 02:56 PM
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#18 | |
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Takin' Her Easy
Join Date: Jul 2006
Posts: 35,516
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Quote:
(If you were offended by this post you shouldn't have fucking well read it you daft cunt) 
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Like blood on iron |
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18-08-08, 03:29 PM
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#19 | |
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Out Patient
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 3,151
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Quote:
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18-08-08, 04:45 PM
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#20 |
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Fagan
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 1,989
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Linford Christie walks into a golf club
The man on reception, looking embarrassed, says " I'm very sorry but we don't allow black men here, theres another club ten minutes down the road that may be able to help " " but I'm Linford Christie ! " " ok, three minutes down the road, now fuck off "
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Keep this quiet if you carefully grind off the edges of a 50p coin you can use it as a 10p |
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18-08-08, 11:48 AM
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#21 |
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Out Patient
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 3,151
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Why did the girl fall off the swing?
She had no arms |
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18-08-08, 11:54 AM
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#22 |
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Out Patient
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 3,151
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Whats the difference between a priest and acne?
acne waits until you're a teenager to come on your face |
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18-08-08, 11:54 AM
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#23 |
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Passion for fire alarms or extinguishers?
Join Date: Jul 2006
Posts: 34,986
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all of u are banned!
Q: What is the difference between a Catholic priest and acne? A: Acne waits until you're 13 to come on your face.
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i own everton fans on the internet....that's what i do |
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18-08-08, 11:54 AM
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#24 |
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Out Patient
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 3,151
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Q: What has 4 legs and one arm?
A: A Doberman in a playground |
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18-08-08, 11:55 AM
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#25 |
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Passion for fire alarms or extinguishers?
Join Date: Jul 2006
Posts: 34,986
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haha timing of that!
__________________
i own everton fans on the internet....that's what i do |
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18-08-08, 11:55 AM
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#26 |
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Out Patient
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 3,151
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Too late dude.
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18-08-08, 11:56 AM
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#27 |
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George Soros
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 14,653
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might wanna put NSFW or 18 on this thread....sickly funny though
__________________
Cheers Subby www.subbytech.com - Use your "est" discount code to get 15% off everything in the store too MetalliGear Neo Qube : Ryzen 5900x : Gigabyte x570 Aorus Elite : 32GB Vengence 3600Mhz : Sabrent Gen 4 NVME SSD : RX580 : MasterLiquid 360 : 850w G2 : CableMod custom cables : Win 10 |
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18-08-08, 11:56 AM
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#28 |
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Out Patient
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 3,151
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Whats the best thing about punching a transexual in the face?
You get all of the pleasure of hitting a woman and none of the guilt. |
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18-08-08, 11:57 AM
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#29 |
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Out Patient
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 3,151
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Whats black and sits at the top of the stairs?
Stephen Hawking in a house fire. |
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18-08-08, 11:59 AM
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#30 | |
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Dalglish
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 4,510
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Quote:
__________________
"My commitment to Liverpool is 100 per cent. I would die for that Liverpool shirt. I think the club loves me and I feel the same, no matter what the situation." - Pepe Reina, Nov '09. |
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18-08-08, 11:59 AM
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#31 |
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Out Patient
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 3,151
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Q. What do a Priest and a Pint of Guinness have in common?
A. A bad one will tear the arse out of you. |
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18-08-08, 12:05 PM
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#32 |
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Dalglish
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 2,031
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Q: What's the difference between Santa Claus and a Jew? A: Santa Claus goes down the chimney. |
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18-08-08, 12:00 PM
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#33 |
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Out Patient
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 3,151
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What's red, sticky, and crawls up your leg?
Homesick Abortion |
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18-08-08, 12:00 PM
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#34 |
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Passion for fire alarms or extinguishers?
Join Date: Jul 2006
Posts: 34,986
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i shall put a warning on the thread - but guarenteed that will only attract people to come in and critisice and have a go etc - we would be better off giving it a random 'code' name like "Peter Kay Jokes" then noone would ever check
__________________
i own everton fans on the internet....that's what i do |
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18-08-08, 12:01 PM
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#35 |
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Out Patient
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 3,151
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Hahaha....
I await the PC brigade. |
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18-08-08, 12:03 PM
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#36 |
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Baron Münchhausen
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 4,634
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Two gay blokes are at home naked and one says to the other, "Don't start until I get back from the toilet". He goes to the toilet, comes back and there is semen on the floor. He yells, "Oh my god, you already started" to which his boyfriend replies, "No I didn't, I just farted"
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18-08-08, 12:05 PM
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#37 |
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Baron Münchhausen
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 4,634
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I keep having my profile on that dating website 'Match.com' rejected.
One of the questions is, 'What do you want in a woman?'. Apparently 'my dick' is not an acceptable answer. Two men in a pub and one is riding a Bucking Bronco Machine. He lasts over 10 minutes. 'Crikey mate, that was impressive!' 'I get lots of practice' replied the other guy. 'My wifes epileptic' |
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18-08-08, 12:17 PM
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#38 |
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Fagan
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 1,989
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Winston is a five year old Nigerian boy
Despite having only one leg, he has to pedal his bike 15 miles every day to get to school His bike doesn't have tyres and the one working pedal is on the wrong side for him Please send just £2.50 so you can receive the video, its funny as fuck
__________________
Keep this quiet if you carefully grind off the edges of a 50p coin you can use it as a 10p |
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18-08-08, 12:08 PM
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#39 |
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Est's Frank Spencer
Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 5,040
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maura hindley is walking across the moores on a dark misty night with a wee girl holding her hand.....
the girl looks up into mauras face - "im scared" she says..... "your scared, i have to walk back on my own"
__________________
"Sky and Setanta have the right to choose their games and it will be the same for everyone. So Mr Ferguson will not be complaining about fixtures and a campaign against United. "Or there is another option. That Mr Ferguson organises the fixtures in his office and sends it to us and everyone will know and cannot complain. That is simple."
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18-08-08, 12:08 PM
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#40 |
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Baron Münchhausen
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 4,634
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whats better than winning a gold medal in the Paralympics?
Not being handicapped. |
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