Milking Machine

[Red_hot]

MILKING MACHINE


A farmer ordered a high-tech milking machine. Since the equipment arrived
when his wife was out of town, he decided to test it on himself first. So,
he inserted his "manhood" into the equipment, turned on the switch and
everything else was automatic. Soon, he realised that the equipment
provided him with much more pleasure than his wife did. When the fun was over, though, he quickly realised that he couldn't remove the instrument from
his 'member'. He read the manual but didn't find any useful information on how
to disengage himself.

He tried every button on the instrument, but still without success. Finally, he decided to call the supplier's Customer Service Hot Line with his mobile phone (Thank god for mobile phones!). "Hello, I just bought a milking machine from your company. It works fantastic, but how do I remove it from the cow's udder?"

"Don't worry sir" replied the customer service rep, The machine will release automatically once it's collected two gallons, have a nice day.....

:D

[The Wolfman]

it raised a smile anyway.

[StevieGnR]

:haha: :crackoff:

[der_Fuchs]

These 2 farmers out near where I live spent a lot of money on a prize bull, but when it went out to inseminate their herd, it got carried away and suffered a withdrawn testicle. A vet charged them £300 to stick a length of hosepipe up its backside and blow hard, which soon set it right and got it back in action. Next morning, however, the testicle had withdrawn again and the bull was distinctly uninterested in the cows.
They didn't want to pay £300 for the vet again, so they got a bit of hosepipe from the garden and stuck it up the bull's bum. The first farmer blew down it until he was red in the face, but it was no use. After a while, the second farmer says let me try, turns the hose round, then one quick puff and bingo - the bull is back in business.
'That's amazing,' says the first farmer - 'but what made you turn the pipe round?'
'Well,' says the second, 'I didn't want that end after it had been in your mouth, did I?'

[Morse]

:chunks: