Weird football injuries...

[johnp]

When he got to hospital and the nursing staff asked him how it happened he told them he fell off a donkey!!

[Tinkerbitch]

Darren Barnard slipped on puppy piss

[Parm]

There's a bit in today's Sunday Mirror about a dutch guy who ****ed his knee up, not in training/match but whilst doing his missus in the shower! He's been ruled out for 10 months!!

[DannyMan2006]

http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/1068546.stm


He had to withdraw from an international match after an accident while jogging. He collided with a moose.

How the **** can you collide with Moose whilst Jogging FFS!

[Harv]

There's a bit in today's Sunday Mirror about a dutch guy who ****ed his knee up, not in training/match but whilst doing his missus in the shower! He's been ruled out for 10 months!!

[wiw]

one of my teammates scared the **** ouit of me when i first joined my club. he told me about one of their games the previous season when an oppostion player fell real awkwardly and his leg came out of his hip socket. nothing too weird there but when the physio came onto the pitch he decided to put it straight back in without checking the surrounding area....and caught the poor *******s testicle in the socket. not only did he lose one of his balls but the scream he let out when it happened was so loud he tore / ruptured his vocal chords and had to have surgery to repair them. sick cunt was laughing whilst he was telling the story too!!!

[-V-]

I once broke my toe playing Footy. I went to chip the ball over the keeper.........but there was a brick sticking slightly out of the ground - hidden by the long grass. Unfortuanately for me i smashed my toe right into the brick. Still shiver when i think of the pain

[lfcchris]

I once broke my toe playing Footy. I went to chip the ball over the keeper.........but there was a brick sticking slightly out of the ground - hidden by the long grass. Unfortuanately for me i smashed my toe right into the brick. Still shiver when i think of the pain

Did that myself when I was playing Footy in the street when I was a kid. The ball was on an uneven paving slab. As I planted my standing foot on it, the slab lifted, the ball rolled down and I smashed my foot into the side of the slab. I couldnt walk properly for a couple of weeks!!!!!!!!!!

[-V-]

Dont laugh. I think i crawled home that day and may have even cried a little

[Shaggy]

Not a remotely weird injury but I fractured my foot in one of those blockbuster 50/50 challenges where you take an almighty swing at the ball at precisely the same time your opponent does. With run ups, too.

We both went down like sacks of **** and the pain I felt was incredible. I got an utter pasting when I was 13 (broken arm, broken nose, broken ribs etc) and this foot injury was more painful....although only because I went into some bizarre shock mode when I got my kicking and hardly felt a thing.

[jonesie]

Darren Fletcher was apparently knocked out by a toilet door last week. Although I suppose calling him a 'footballer' is stretching it a bit.

http://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/scottish-news/page.cfm?headline=man-utd-star-darren-fletcher-knocked-out-by-toilet-door-&method=full&objectid=20346565&siteid=86908&tmExt=html

Man Utd Star Darren Fletcher Knocked Out By Toilet Door
Mar 10 2008 Exclusive by Keith Mcleod

FOOTBALL star Darren Fletcher was left unconscious and bleeding when a toilet door fell on his head.

The Scotland midfielder was revived in the Old Trafford dressing room after he starred in Manchester United's 1-0 Champions League win over Lyon.

As boss Sir Alex Ferguson was being interviewed yards away, Darren, 24, was being treated by club medics.

He needed stitches in his gaping head gash.

A club insider said: "It happened half an hour after the end of the match. It looked very, very nasty.

"I saw blood pouring out and the medical staff had to treat him there and then.

"I know he got stitches. He looked pretty dazed and pretty shocked.

"You don't expect a door to just fall on you."

United reached the quarter finals with a 2-1 aggregate win.

The source said: "The dressing room was relaxed and happy after the match - it was a case of job done.

"It seems that there was something seriously wrong with the toilet door.

"I don't know if fittings had come loose or what - but when Darren went to open the door, it came away and clobbered him.

"It was a nasty wound but it could have been worse.

"The other players were looking about scratching their heads in disbelief but at least medical staff were right there on the spot."

Fletcher's mishap is the latest in a series of bizarre incidents around the Old Trafford dressing rooms.

In February 2003, David Beckham suffered a head graze after a flying boot hit him full on the face.

It is believed the boot was kicked by an angry Fergie.

In October 2004, there were reports of flying pizza following a bad-tempered match with Arsenal.

Other strange football injuries include Chelsea keeper Dave Beasant who hurt his foot after he let a salad cream bottle slip from his grasp.

Leeds star David Batty hurt his ankle after a toddler drove over it on a tricycle.

Midfielder Darren Barnard of Barnsley damaged knee ligaments when he slipped in a puddle of puppy urine.

And Dundee striker Derek Lyle had to miss Saturday's 2-0 Scottish Cup defeat by Queen of the South after he fell through a coffee table and cut his stomach.

[-V-]

So thats why its called Old Toilet

[Reaper]

Shaun Goater injured a foot while playing for Man City against Birmingham in the autumn for 2003. The injury was sustained when he kicked an advertising hoarding in celebration of a goal by Nic Anelka. Goater had to be substituted.



Also in 2003, Villa striker Darius Vassell injured himself while attempting DIY surgery on his own foot. He had a blood blister under the toe-nail on his big toe and was using a power drill to drill through the nail and drain the wound. Drilling to drain such blisters is not an uncommon procedure, but normally it is conducted by a qualified person under sterile conditions. Vassell made it worse, picked up an infection, and had to have half the nail removed.

[jonesie]

Also in 2003, Villa striker Darius Vassell injured himself while attempting DIY surgery on his own foot. He had a blood blister under the toe-nail on his big toe and was using a power drill to drill through the nail and drain the wound. Drilling to drain such blisters is not an uncommon procedure, but normally it is conducted by a qualified person under sterile conditions. Vassell made it worse, picked up an infection, and had to have half the nail removed.

I remember that. What a stupid *******.

[CJ]

didnt stensgaard injure himself while ironing?