Manchester United

[red g]

Shame us keeping Lovren has made United stronger.

[Irishnev]

Can we get an agent to clarify what that means please.

You asking for a friend?

[McDermotX]

"A Liverpool fan, an Arsenal fan and a Manchester United fan were all in Saudi Arabia drinking a smuggled crate of booze.

All of a sudden Saudi police rushed in and arrested them.

For their punishment the Saudi Arabia Sheik decided that the punishment should be 20 lashes with a whip.

As they were preparing for their punishment, the Sheik suddenly said: "It is my first wife's birthday today, and she has asked me to allow each of you one wish before your whipping."

The Arsenal fan was first in line (he had consumed the least), so he thought about it for a while and then said: "Please tie a pillow to my back."

This was done, but the pillow only lasted 10 lashes before the whip went through it.

The Arsenal fan had to be carried away bleeding and crying when the punishment was done.

The Manchester United fan was next up (he almost finished a half-keg), and after watching the scene, said: "Choice! Please fix two pillows on my back."

But even two pillows could only take 15 lashes before the whip went through again.

The Liverpool fan was the last one up (he had finished off the keg), but before he could say anything, the Sheikh turned to him and said: "You are from a most beautiful part of England, your city has some of the best and most loyal football fans in the world. For this, you may have two wishes!"

"Cheers mate, your Most Royal and Merciful highness", the Liverpool fan replied.

"In recognition of your kindness, my first wish is that you give me not 20, but 100 lashes."

"Not only are you an honorable, handsome and powerful man, you are also very brave." The Sheik said with an admiring look on his face.

"If 100 lashes is what you desire, then so be it. And your second wish? What is it to be?" the Sheik asked.

"Tie that Manchester United fan to my back..."

[baitman]

Thanks for blowing the cobwebs off that one

[Irishnev]

wrong thread

[Fosterbloke]

Hahahahaha

[Patricks_Berger]

Can we get an agent to clarify what that means please.

Asking for a friend?

[baitman]

Sanchez moves on loan to inter, and utd are paying the chunk of his £400,000 PER WEEK wages while he's away on his holidays

He is the highest earner at Old Trafford, and it is believed United are subsidising his wage - around £400,000 a week - to allow the move to Italy.
Sanchez has had a disastrous 19 months at Old Trafford since leaving Arsenal in January 2018, scoring just five times in 45 appearances.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/49491677

[The_weatherman]

Seems their fans reckon Greenwood or Gomes might start in place of Martial. Sanchez leaving actually makes them very light upfront, and injuries to Martial and Rashford can really **** them. Lingard has 1 goal in 20 apps so he's no use. Will be interesting to see them against Southampton, a loss and there is massive pressure on Ole.

[Assassin]

Seems their fans reckon Greenwood or Gomes might start in place of Martial. Sanchez leaving actually makes them very light upfront, and injuries to Martial and Rashford can really **** them. Lingard has 1 goal in 20 apps so he's no use. Will be interesting to see them against Southampton, a loss and there is massive pressure on Ole.

Martial is already out injured. I see Ingsy's Saints making a new hole in between their already softened cheeks this weekend. Ole's at the wheel, will soon be Ole's on the dole

[Norbs]

Both **** Utd forwards playing for Inter

[The_weatherman]

Since United are paying Sanchez, mostly, I think they should have stuck with him for another season, or at least replaced him. They are doing such a fantastically bad job at this rebuilding job that it's beyond my wildest dreams.

[The_weatherman]

Martial is already out injured. I see Ingsy's Saints making a new hole in between their already softened cheeks this weekend. Ole's at the wheel, will soon be Ole's on the dole

Exactly, Shaw out as well, they could be real trouble soon. Hope Rangers and United are drawn in the same group.

[Assassin]

Exactly, Shaw out as well, they could be real trouble soon. Hope Rangers and United are drawn in the same group.

Dream draw

[Kenneth]

I guess they've got to consider it progress, clearing out expensive deadwood.