True story

[Neil Young]

Gerry Armstrong was on the same flight as me yesterday. He was sat across the aisle, one row behind. His hair looks even more ridiculous in real life than on telly - thinning, slicked back and curly, dyed a reddish brown that immediately calls to mind not the top of a human head but the terracotta tiles of rooftops in Tuscany. He's shorter than me so it reminded me of looking down on the city from the campanile in Florence.

He spent the whole flight reading a local paper and playing patience on his phone. Before we took off he phoned someone called Kevin and told him he was recommending him for a job.

You heard it here first. Unless you're Kevin.

[Fredo]

Are you talking about the footballer or the Scientology dude?

[Shaggy]

Was the flight between England and Spain?

[Neil Young]

It's in General Football for a reason, Puss.

[Fivex]

Why would he post about a scientology dude in the footy forum?

[Fredo]

Yeah didn't notice.

[Neil Young]

Was the flight between England and Spain?

Belfast to London.

I don't think he goes to Spain. Not for Sky coverage anyway. They all sit in a studio in Isleworth or some other godforsaken suburban backwater.

I always enjoyed it when they used to say he had made his way to the studio back from the "commentary position" as though he'd legged it along a high-up stadium gangway instead of from the VT suite next door.

[saj]

Richard Bacon was sat to the left of me on a train from Manchester to London yesterday. In fact, he was stood up for a while as there was no space on the train

[Fredo]

Was he the one who had a sweet left foot? If yes, I think I saw him play in his forties for a soccer sevens tournament somewhere back home.

[Fosterbloke]

You fly business class Neil?

[Neil Young]

Certainly not. Usually private jet, otherwise first.

Like f*ck. Business class on BA from Belfast - I don't think it exists. I was in row 3 too, admittedly surrounded by pinstripes, along with the ex-footballer whose jowly, sagging face offers a disconcerting contrast to the rich and lustrous tone of his few lacquered strands.

[Fosterbloke]

sagging face offers a disconcerting contrast to the rich and lustrous tone of his few lacquered strands.

You should ask him which brand of dog biscuits he eats.

[Pablo]

Were the rest of the Pacemakers on the same flight?

[Lee]

His hair looks even more ridiculous in real life than on telly - thinning, slicked back and curly, dyed a reddish brown that immediately calls to mind not the top of a human head but the terracotta tiles of rooftops in Tuscany. He's shorter than me so it reminded me of looking down on the city from the campanile in Florence.

Superb description.

Were the rest of the Pacemakers on the same flight?

:groan:

[kev776]

I turned the job down, I wouldn't get out of bed for 50k a year and I don't know anybody who would plus I know nothing about hair dye.