We are here in Detroit, home of the Tigers, Lions, Red Wings and Pistons for SEASON THREE, EPISODE TWO of NXT. No pyro. I like that sort of beginning, reminds of the greyer days.
EXCUSE ME, EXCUSE ME was bellowed from the biggest heel on televised wrestling, Vickie Guerrero. Fantastic. Michael Cole was rubbing his hands with glee (between his cock). Vickie proceeded with her promo about how last week the lovely Kaitlin embarrassed her so she was introducing a real star. Which I never saw because out came Dolph Ziggler. Maybe she doesn't know the definition of real. Or star. Mixed tag match to kick things off as Primo and AJ took on Ziggler and Kaitlin. Summary of the match: women looked bad, guys looked great especially Primo. Ziggler won with some wacky move and then Kaitlin and Ziggler celebrated, a bit too much for the green eyed monster Vickie Guerrero. This storyline has been fast forwarded way too quickly (if you watched Smackdown, you'll know what I'm on about)
Maxine delivered her video package where she emphasised POWER and CONTROL. Good luck getting a job.
Next was a JOKE OFF. Seriously? I heard JERK OFF. That may have been more entertaining.
AJ did a blonde, brunette and red head joke which stunk the place out. NO BUYS. Aksana done Maryse's gimmick of speaking in her native language but then repeated the joke 'What's the difference between a wife and a girlfriend?' 'About 40 pounds' HO HO. Here's your fiver. Muscles Jamie done a knock knock joke which was a rib on the previous two contestants. I laughed. 'Knock knock' 'Who's there' 'Aksana' 'Aksana who?' Exactly'. Naomi done a joke about a dog. Michael Cole commented that he wants Naomi to win all the challenges so the show ends early. FABULOUS. Maxine said she has five jokes in the ring with her right now. She pulled out a $20 and made a PG joke to A.J., which set off a PG cat fight. Michael Cole made the inevitable Joey Styles joke (you'll know it if you watched ECW) Striker tried to restore order before Kaitlyn did another knock-knock joke on A.J., which set off another cat fight. Mathews wanted to know where the joke was. AMAZING. Striker let things settle down and polled the audience. Jamie easily won the crowd reaction. Cole said this is ridiculous.
Cole went into gong bashing mode. He felt everyone besides him and Matthews should be gonged including the people who paid their ticket to be there. He gonged until they went on a break. Why was the gong there? I don't care but that was brilliant.
Next was Aksana v Jamie. Again **** match. Commentators told a bit of a story about each of the individuals. At one point, Cole commented on one of them having a degree in SPORTS TECHNOLOGY AND TOURISM and he would like to have a tour with one of them. Matthews pulled him up on this and asked, 'WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?' You could visibly see Cole cackling on the desk. Jamie won in two minutes. They made it clear that the challenges make you immune from elimination. WHY HAVE A ****ING RING AND SOME MATCHES THEN?
Naomi done her video package where she was a trampoline slam dunker. Looked good. Great big ass though.
Backstage, Vickie was cross with Dolph and told him to keep his hands on her and she would miss this (wacky body gyration)
NEXT - OBSTACLE COURSE. Where's Mike Adamle when you need him?
Kaitlin was about to start when Vickie Guerrero interrupted and decided she had to show these rookies how to do it. She was excellent here. She was doing fine until she 'fell' and freaked out. (she done it so she didn't look good in front of the other rookies) Everyone done their courses and Kaitlin won. The main gripe was the ****ing referee counting the push ups. Arsewipe.
Show concluded with Cole going gong crazy, saying he was a war correspondent and this show sucks and he walked off.
OVERALL: Show is a barrel of laughs. It doesn't take itself seriously and I love it. Hopefully someone good replaces Michael Cole like Jerry Lawler or Joey Styles.
EXCUSE ME, EXCUSE ME was bellowed from the biggest heel on televised wrestling, Vickie Guerrero. Fantastic. Michael Cole was rubbing his hands with glee (between his cock). Vickie proceeded with her promo about how last week the lovely Kaitlin embarrassed her so she was introducing a real star. Which I never saw because out came Dolph Ziggler. Maybe she doesn't know the definition of real. Or star. Mixed tag match to kick things off as Primo and AJ took on Ziggler and Kaitlin. Summary of the match: women looked bad, guys looked great especially Primo. Ziggler won with some wacky move and then Kaitlin and Ziggler celebrated, a bit too much for the green eyed monster Vickie Guerrero. This storyline has been fast forwarded way too quickly (if you watched Smackdown, you'll know what I'm on about)
Maxine delivered her video package where she emphasised POWER and CONTROL. Good luck getting a job.
Next was a JOKE OFF. Seriously? I heard JERK OFF. That may have been more entertaining.
AJ did a blonde, brunette and red head joke which stunk the place out. NO BUYS. Aksana done Maryse's gimmick of speaking in her native language but then repeated the joke 'What's the difference between a wife and a girlfriend?' 'About 40 pounds' HO HO. Here's your fiver. Muscles Jamie done a knock knock joke which was a rib on the previous two contestants. I laughed. 'Knock knock' 'Who's there' 'Aksana' 'Aksana who?' Exactly'. Naomi done a joke about a dog. Michael Cole commented that he wants Naomi to win all the challenges so the show ends early. FABULOUS. Maxine said she has five jokes in the ring with her right now. She pulled out a $20 and made a PG joke to A.J., which set off a PG cat fight. Michael Cole made the inevitable Joey Styles joke (you'll know it if you watched ECW) Striker tried to restore order before Kaitlyn did another knock-knock joke on A.J., which set off another cat fight. Mathews wanted to know where the joke was. AMAZING. Striker let things settle down and polled the audience. Jamie easily won the crowd reaction. Cole said this is ridiculous.
Cole went into gong bashing mode. He felt everyone besides him and Matthews should be gonged including the people who paid their ticket to be there. He gonged until they went on a break. Why was the gong there? I don't care but that was brilliant.
Next was Aksana v Jamie. Again **** match. Commentators told a bit of a story about each of the individuals. At one point, Cole commented on one of them having a degree in SPORTS TECHNOLOGY AND TOURISM and he would like to have a tour with one of them. Matthews pulled him up on this and asked, 'WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?' You could visibly see Cole cackling on the desk. Jamie won in two minutes. They made it clear that the challenges make you immune from elimination. WHY HAVE A ****ING RING AND SOME MATCHES THEN?
Naomi done her video package where she was a trampoline slam dunker. Looked good. Great big ass though.
Backstage, Vickie was cross with Dolph and told him to keep his hands on her and she would miss this (wacky body gyration)
NEXT - OBSTACLE COURSE. Where's Mike Adamle when you need him?
Kaitlin was about to start when Vickie Guerrero interrupted and decided she had to show these rookies how to do it. She was excellent here. She was doing fine until she 'fell' and freaked out. (she done it so she didn't look good in front of the other rookies) Everyone done their courses and Kaitlin won. The main gripe was the ****ing referee counting the push ups. Arsewipe.
Show concluded with Cole going gong crazy, saying he was a war correspondent and this show sucks and he walked off.
OVERALL: Show is a barrel of laughs. It doesn't take itself seriously and I love it. Hopefully someone good replaces Michael Cole like Jerry Lawler or Joey Styles.
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