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So which lonely heart is Jay...

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    So which lonely heart is Jay...

    After jay's recent luck in the classifieds, I looked up some lonely hearts from the emerald isle....


    Bitter, disillusioned Bundoran man lately rejected by long-time fiancée seeks decent, honest, reliable woman, if such a thing still exists in this cruel county of hatchet-faced bitches. Box53/41

    Grossly overweight turf-cutter, 42 years old and 23 stone, Gemini, seeks nimble sexpot, preferably Downings area, for tango sessions, candlelit dinners and humid nights of screaming passion. Must have own car and be willing to travel. Box09/08

    Clonmany man, 50, in desperate need of a ride. Anything considered.
    Even Buncrana women. Box06/03

    Heavy drinker, 35, Letterkenny area, seeks gorgeous sex addict interested in pints, fags, Finn Harps club and starting scraps in market square at three in the morning. Box73/82.

    Ginger-haired Newtoncunningham troublemaker, gets slit-eyed and shirty After a few scoops, seeks attractive, wealthy lady for bail purposes, maybe more Box84/87

    Artistic Fanad woman, 53, petite, loves rainy walks on the Fanad bog,writing poetry, unusual Fanad cow-dung and interesting brown rice dishes, seeks mystic dreamer for companionship, back rubs and more as we bounce along like little tumbling clouds on life's beautiful crazy journey.
    Strong stomach essential Box12/32

    Chartered accountant, 30,Likes a drink, seeks female for marriage. Duties will include cooking, light cleaning and accompanying me to office social functions. References required. No timewasters. Box23/45

    Bad-tempered, foul-mouthed old ******* living in a damp cottage in the arse end of Donegal Town seeks attractive 21-year old blonde lady with big chest. Box40/27

    Devil-worshiper, Gweedore area, seeks like-minded lady for wining and dining, good conversation, dancing, romantic walks and slaughtering dogs in cemeteries at midnight under the flinty light of a pale moon. Box52/07

    Attractive brunette, Raphoe, winner of Miss Wrangler competition at Frankies nightclub, in September 1978, seeks nostalgic man who's not afraid to cry, for long nights spent comfort-drinking and listening to old Declan Nerney records. Please, Please! Box30/41

    Carndonagh man, 27, medium build, brown hair, blue eyes, seeks alibi For the night of February 27 between 8pm and 11.30pm

    ...
    Don't take life too seriously or you'll never get out alive.

    #2
    ****in funny mate

    How long did it take you to write them ???????????

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