"Jokes" you like.....but shouldnt

[Joe King]

Little Sally came home from school and with a smile on her face told her mother: "Me and Frank Brown were playing today and he got his willy out!"

Before the mother could raise a concern, Sally went on to say, "It reminded me of a peanut"

Relaxing with a hidden smile, Sally's Mum asked, "Really, small was it?"

"No" Sally replied "Salty!"

Thats just wrong


but ****ing funny

[cobain]

Little Sally came home from school and with a smile on her face told her mother: "Me and Frank Brown were playing today and he got his willy out!"

Before the mother could raise a concern, Sally went on to say, "It reminded me of a peanut"

Relaxing with a hidden smile, Sally's Mum asked, "Really, small was it?"

"No" Sally replied "Salty!"

[Dan]

Can we please keep away from the McCann jokes? Lets hear some actual funny ones instead

[Dhav]

Can we please keep away from the McCann jokes? Lets hear some actual funny ones instead

The Renault McCann one was hilarious.

As for the Madeleine/Pope one

[bobbyfallon]

whats small and black and bumps into radiators???

jordans baby

[Pacman]

whats small and black and bumps into radiators???

jordans baby

[Joe King]

Michael Barrymore has offered Manchester United £1 million pounds to play as their striker because he wants 10 pricks behind him and 67,000 assholes jumping up and down.

[Neil Young]

How do you know when your sister is on the rags?

Your dads dick tastes funny.

We don't all live on the Isle of Man you know.

[Bob]

Michael Barrymore has offered Manchester United £1 million pounds to play as their striker because he wants 10 pricks behind him and 67,000 assholes jumping up and down.

Michael Barrymore was recently asked if he was doing panto this year. "Buggered if i know... but very unlikely! I did Aladdin six years ago and still haven't heard the end of it!

Then there was that incident with Snow White, for some reason i got terrible mood swings...

One minute he'd be feeling Happy, and the next minute i'd come all over Grumpy."

[bobbyfallon]

whats black and blue and hates sex ????

a rape victim

[bobbyfallon]

what do you call an arab flying a plane ?????

a pilot you racist **** !!!!

[Johnny]

Did you hear about the handicapped bus that went over a cliff.?











It took firemen 30 minutes to dig the bus out of the wreckage.

[lfcchris]

I have been involved in a terrible accident. I ran into 3 Mancs on a zebra crossing!!
One went through my windscreen, the 2nd dented my bonnet, the 3rd got knocked 200 yards up the road.
Police have been great.
Ones been done for breaking and entering, one for criminal damage and the other for leaving the scene of a crime

[lfcchris]

A bloke catches a tasty bird giving him the eye in the supermarket.
"Do I know you?" he says. She asks him "arent you the father of one of my children?"

He quickly thinks back to the only time he was ever unfaithful and adds "wereyou the hooker I ****ed over the snooker table at my stag do while your mate spanked me with a piece of wet celery whilst shoving a huge cucumber up my arse?"

"No!" she replies, "I'm your daughters teacher"

[Dan]

A bloke catches a tasty bird giving him the eye in the supermarket.
"Do I know you?" he says. She asks him "arent you the father of one of my children?"

He quickly thinks back to the only time he was ever unfaithful and adds "wereyou the hooker I ****ed over the snooker table at my stag do while your mate spanked me with a piece of wet celery whilst shoving a huge cucumber up my arse?"

"No!" she replies, "I'm your daughters teacher"