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    British Quiz Contestants

    Some classics.



    UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE (BBC2)
    Jeremy Paxman: What is another name for 'cherrypickers' and 'cheesemongers'?
    Contestant: Homosexuals.
    Paxman: No. They're nicknames for regiments in the British Army who will be very upset with you.

    BEG, BORROW OR STEAL (BBC2)
    Jamie Theakston: Where do you think Cambridge University is?
    Contestant: Geography isn't my strong point.
    Theakston: There's a clue in the title.
    Contestant: Leicester.

    BBC NORFOLK
    Stewart White: Who had a worldwide hit with What A Wonderful World?
    Contestant: I don't know.
    White: I'll give you some clues: what do you call the part between your hand and your elbow?
    Contestant: Arm.
    White: Correct. And if you're not weak, you're...?
    Contestant: Strong.
    White: Correct - and what was Lord Mountbatten's first name?
    Contestant: Louis.
    White: Well, there we are then. So who had a worldwide hit with the song What A Wonderful World?
    Contestant: Frank Sinatra?

    LATE SHOW (BBC MIDLANDS)
    Alex Trelinski: What is the capital of Italy?
    Contestant: France.
    Trelinski: France is another country. Try again.
    Contestant: Oh, um, Benidorm.
    Trelinski: Wrong, sorry, let's try another question.
    In which country is the Parthenon?
    Contestant: Sorry, I don't know.
    Trelinski: Just guess a country t hen.
    Contestant: Paris.

    THE WEAKEST LINK (BBC2)
    Anne Robinson: Oscar Wilde, Adolf Hitler and Jeffrey Archer have all written books about their experiences in what - Prison or the Conservative Party?
    Contestant: The Conservative Party.

    BEACON RADIO (WOLVERHAMPTON)
    DJ Mark: For Pounds 10, what is the nationality of the Pope?
    Ruth from Rowley Regis: I think I know that one. Is it Jewish?

    UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE
    Bamber Gascoigne: What was Gandhi's first name?
    Contestant: Goosey?

    GWR FM (Bristol)
    Presenter: What happened in Dallas on November 22, 1963?
    Contestant: I don't know, I wasn't watching it then.

    RTE RADIO 2FM (IRELAND)
    Presenter: What is the name of the long-running TV comedy show about pensioners: Last Of The ...?
    Caller: Mohicans.

    PHIL WOOD SHOW (BBC RADIO MANCHESTER)
    Phil: What's 11 squared?
    Contestant: I don't know.
    Phil: I'll give you a clue. It's two ones with a two in the middle.
    Contestant: Is it five?

    RICHARD AND JUDY
    Q: Which American actor is married to Nicole Kidman?
    A: Forrest Gump.

    RICHARD AND JUDY
    Leslie: On which street did Sherlock Holmes live?
    Contestant: Er .....
    Leslie: He makes bread.
    Contestant: Er .....
    Leslie: He makes cakes.
    Contestant: Kipling Street?

    LINCS FM PHONE-IN
    Presenter: Which is the largest Spanish-speaking country in the world?
    Contestant: Barcelona.
    Presenter: I was really after the name of a country. Contestant: I'm sorry, I don't know the names of any countries in Spain.

    NATIONAL LOTTERY (BBC1)
    Question: What is the world's largest continent?
    Contestant: The Pacific

    ROCK FM (PRESTON)
    Presenter: Name a film starring Bob Hoskins that is also the name of a famous painting by Leonardo Da Vinci.
    Contestant: Who Framed Roger Rabbit?

    THE BIGGEST GAME IN TOWN (ITV)
    Steve Le Fevre: What was signed, to bring World War I to an end in 1918?
    Contestant: Magna Carta?

    JAMES O'BRIEN SHOW (LBC)
    O'Brien: How many kings of England have been called Henry?
    Contestant: Er, well, I know there was a Henry the Eighth .... er.... er.... three?

    CHRIS SEARLE SHOW (BBC RADIO BRISTOL)
    S e arle: In which European country is Mount Etna?
    Caller: Japan.
    Searle: I did say which European country, so in case you didn't hear that, I can let you try again.
    Caller: Er .... Mexico?

    PAUL WAPPAT(BBC RADIO NEWCASTLE)
    Paul Wappat: How long did the Six-Day War between Egypt and Israel last?
    Contestant (after a long pause): Fourteen days.

    DARYL DENHAM'S DRIVE TIME (VIRGIN RADIO)
    Daryl Denham: In which country would you spend shekels?
    Contestant: Holland?
    Denham: Try the next letter of the alphabet.
    Contestant: Iceland? Ireland?
    Denham (helpfully): It's a bad line. Did you say Israel?
    Contestant: No.

    PHIL WOOD SHOW (BBC GMR)
    Wood: What 'K' could be described as the Islamic Bible?
    Contestant: Er .....
    Wood: It's got two syllables ..... Kor ....
    Cont e stant: Blimey!
    Wood: Ha ha ha ha, no. The past participle of run.
    Contestant: ..... (silence)
    Wood: OK, try it another way. Today I run, yesterday I .....?
    Contestant: Walked?

    THE VAULT
    Melanie Sykes: What is the name given to the condition where the sufferer can fall asleep at any time?
    Contestant: Nostalgia.

    LUNCHTIME SHOW (BRMB)
    Presenter: What religion was Guy Fawkes?
    Contestant: Jewish.
    Presenter: That's close enough.

    STEVE WRIGHT IN THE AFTERNOON (BBC RADIO 2)
    Wright: Johnny Weissmuller died on this day. Which jungle-swinging character clad only in a loincloth did he play?
    Contestant: Jesus.

    #2
    Actual answers given to Larry Gogan on the Just a Minute Quiz. (Irish Radio Station)



    >1) Something a blind man might use? A Sword

    >2) A Song with the word Moon in the title? Blue Suede Moon

    >3) Name the Capital of France? F

    >4) Name a bird with a long Neck? Naomi Campbell

    >5) Name an occupation where you might need a torch? A burglar

    >6) Where is the Taj Mahal? Opposite the Dental Hospital

    >7) What is Hitlers first name ? Heil

    >8) As happy as.... (Larry gave a hint - think of my name) A pig in ****

    >9) Some famous brothers ? Bonnie and Clyde.

    >10) A dangerous race ? The Arabs

    >11) Something that floats in a bath ? Water

    >12) An item of clothing worn by the Three Musketeers ? A horse

    >13) Something you wear on a beach ? A deckchair

    >14) A famous Royal ? Mail

    >15) Something that flies that doesn't have an engine ? A bicycle with wings

    >16) A famous bridge ? The Bridge Over Troubled Waters

    >17) Something a cat does ? Goes to the Toilet

    >18) Something you do in the bathroom ? Decorate

    >19) A method of securing your home ? Put the kettle on

    >20) Something associated with pigs ? The Police

    >21) A sign of the Zodiac ? April

    >22) Something people might be allergic to ? Skiing

    >23) Something you do before you go to bed ? Sleep

    >24) Something you put on walls ? A roof

    >25) Something Slippery ? A conman

    >26) A kind of ache ? A fillet of fish

    >27) A Jacket Potato topping ? Jam

    >28) A food that can be brown or white ? A potato

    >29) A famous Scotsman? Jock

    >30) A famous Scotsman? Vinnie Jones

    >31) Something you open other than a door ? Your bowels

    >32) What star do travelers follow? Joe Dolan
    That rug really tied the room together.

    Comment


      #3

      Comment


        #4
        you got to love the irish

        Comment


          #5
          a dangerous race - the arabs -
          i own everton fans on the internet....that's what i do

          Comment


            #6
            Originally posted by Shanks007 View Post



            UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE (BBC2)
            Jeremy Paxman: What is another name for 'cherrypickers' and 'cheesemongers'?
            Contestant: Homosexuals.
            Paxman: No. They're nicknames for regiments in the British Army who will be very upset with you.
            Best one of the lot

            Comment


              #7
              Originally posted by Shanks007 View Post
              Some classics.



              UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE (BBC2)
              Jeremy Paxman: What is another name for 'cherrypickers' and 'cheesemongers'?
              Contestant: Homosexuals.
              Paxman: No. They're nicknames for regiments in the British Army who will be very upset with you.

              BEG, BORROW OR STEAL (BBC2)
              Jamie Theakston: Where do you think Cambridge University is?
              Contestant: Geography isn't my strong point.
              Theakston: There's a clue in the title.
              Contestant: Leicester.

              BBC NORFOLK
              Stewart White: Who had a worldwide hit with What A Wonderful World?
              Contestant: I don't know.
              White: I'll give you some clues: what do you call the part between your hand and your elbow?
              Contestant: Arm.
              White: Correct. And if you're not weak, you're...?
              Contestant: Strong.
              White: Correct - and what was Lord Mountbatten's first name?
              Contestant: Louis.
              White: Well, there we are then. So who had a worldwide hit with the song What A Wonderful World?
              Contestant: Frank Sinatra?

              LATE SHOW (BBC MIDLANDS)
              Alex Trelinski: What is the capital of Italy?
              Contestant: France.
              Trelinski: France is another country. Try again.
              Contestant: Oh, um, Benidorm.
              Trelinski: Wrong, sorry, let's try another question.
              In which country is the Parthenon?
              Contestant: Sorry, I don't know.
              Trelinski: Just guess a country t hen.
              Contestant: Paris.

              THE WEAKEST LINK (BBC2)
              Anne Robinson: Oscar Wilde, Adolf Hitler and Jeffrey Archer have all written books about their experiences in what - Prison or the Conservative Party?
              Contestant: The Conservative Party.

              BEACON RADIO (WOLVERHAMPTON)
              DJ Mark: For Pounds 10, what is the nationality of the Pope?
              Ruth from Rowley Regis: I think I know that one. Is it Jewish?

              UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE
              Bamber Gascoigne: What was Gandhi's first name?
              Contestant: Goosey?

              GWR FM (Bristol)
              Presenter: What happened in Dallas on November 22, 1963?
              Contestant: I don't know, I wasn't watching it then.

              RTE RADIO 2FM (IRELAND)
              Presenter: What is the name of the long-running TV comedy show about pensioners: Last Of The ...?
              Caller: Mohicans.

              PHIL WOOD SHOW (BBC RADIO MANCHESTER)
              Phil: What's 11 squared?
              Contestant: I don't know.
              Phil: I'll give you a clue. It's two ones with a two in the middle.
              Contestant: Is it five?

              RICHARD AND JUDY
              Q: Which American actor is married to Nicole Kidman?
              A: Forrest Gump.

              RICHARD AND JUDY
              Leslie: On which street did Sherlock Holmes live?
              Contestant: Er .....
              Leslie: He makes bread.
              Contestant: Er .....
              Leslie: He makes cakes.
              Contestant: Kipling Street?

              LINCS FM PHONE-IN
              Presenter: Which is the largest Spanish-speaking country in the world?
              Contestant: Barcelona.
              Presenter: I was really after the name of a country. Contestant: I'm sorry, I don't know the names of any countries in Spain.

              NATIONAL LOTTERY (BBC1)
              Question: What is the world's largest continent?
              Contestant: The Pacific

              ROCK FM (PRESTON)
              Presenter: Name a film starring Bob Hoskins that is also the name of a famous painting by Leonardo Da Vinci.
              Contestant: Who Framed Roger Rabbit?

              THE BIGGEST GAME IN TOWN (ITV)
              Steve Le Fevre: What was signed, to bring World War I to an end in 1918?
              Contestant: Magna Carta?

              JAMES O'BRIEN SHOW (LBC)
              O'Brien: How many kings of England have been called Henry?
              Contestant: Er, well, I know there was a Henry the Eighth .... er.... er.... three?

              CHRIS SEARLE SHOW (BBC RADIO BRISTOL)
              S e arle: In which European country is Mount Etna?
              Caller: Japan.
              Searle: I did say which European country, so in case you didn't hear that, I can let you try again.
              Caller: Er .... Mexico?

              PAUL WAPPAT(BBC RADIO NEWCASTLE)
              Paul Wappat: How long did the Six-Day War between Egypt and Israel last?
              Contestant (after a long pause): Fourteen days.

              DARYL DENHAM'S DRIVE TIME (VIRGIN RADIO)
              Daryl Denham: In which country would you spend shekels?
              Contestant: Holland?
              Denham: Try the next letter of the alphabet.
              Contestant: Iceland? Ireland?
              Denham (helpfully): It's a bad line. Did you say Israel?
              Contestant: No.

              PHIL WOOD SHOW (BBC GMR)
              Wood: What 'K' could be described as the Islamic Bible?
              Contestant: Er .....
              Wood: It's got two syllables ..... Kor ....
              Cont e stant: Blimey!
              Wood: Ha ha ha ha, no. The past participle of run.
              Contestant: ..... (silence)
              Wood: OK, try it another way. Today I run, yesterday I .....?
              Contestant: Walked?

              THE VAULT
              Melanie Sykes: What is the name given to the condition where the sufferer can fall asleep at any time?
              Contestant: Nostalgia.

              LUNCHTIME SHOW (BRMB)
              Presenter: What religion was Guy Fawkes?
              Contestant: Jewish.
              Presenter: That's close enough.

              STEVE WRIGHT IN THE AFTERNOON (BBC RADIO 2)
              Wright: Johnny Weissmuller died on this day. Which jungle-swinging character clad only in a loincloth did he play?
              Contestant: Jesus.


              Seen those before but they never fail to have me LMAO. Almost every single one is an absolute beaut.




              Originally posted by Liverpel View Post
              Actual answers given to Larry Gogan on the Just a Minute Quiz. (Irish Radio Station)



              >1) Something a blind man might use? A Sword

              >2) A Song with the word Moon in the title? Blue Suede Moon

              >3) Name the Capital of France? F

              >4) Name a bird with a long Neck? Naomi Campbell

              >5) Name an occupation where you might need a torch? A burglar

              >6) Where is the Taj Mahal? Opposite the Dental Hospital

              >7) What is Hitlers first name ? Heil

              >8) As happy as.... (Larry gave a hint - think of my name) A pig in ****

              >9) Some famous brothers ? Bonnie and Clyde.

              >10) A dangerous race ? The Arabs

              >11) Something that floats in a bath ? Water

              >12) An item of clothing worn by the Three Musketeers ? A horse

              >13) Something you wear on a beach ? A deckchair

              >14) A famous Royal ? Mail

              >15) Something that flies that doesn't have an engine ? A bicycle with wings

              >16) A famous bridge ? The Bridge Over Troubled Waters

              >17) Something a cat does ? Goes to the Toilet

              >18) Something you do in the bathroom ? Decorate

              >19) A method of securing your home ? Put the kettle on

              >20) Something associated with pigs ? The Police

              >21) A sign of the Zodiac ? April

              >22) Something people might be allergic to ? Skiing

              >23) Something you do before you go to bed ? Sleep

              >24) Something you put on walls ? A roof

              >25) Something Slippery ? A conman

              >26) A kind of ache ? A fillet of fish

              >27) A Jacket Potato topping ? Jam

              >28) A food that can be brown or white ? A potato

              >29) A famous Scotsman? Jock

              >30) A famous Scotsman? Vinnie Jones

              >31) Something you open other than a door ? Your bowels

              >32) What star do travelers follow? Joe Dolan
              They're also funny as **** but I've received those before as answers on Family Fortunes.
              Thanks very much for being ‘This Mornings’ Farmer’

              Comment


                #8


                Always my favourite game show clip.
                James Philip Milner Fanclub #1

                Curtis Julian Jones Fanclub #1

                Comment


                  #9
                  Originally posted by Cacodemon View Post
                  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M2AWKfMvDtw

                  Always my favourite game show clip.
                  An absolute classic.

                  Apparently his headphones failed him briefly while ensconced in "the booth" and he heard a question that could've been answered with 'turkey' - so he said it every time until the question came up.
                  Thanks very much for being ‘This Mornings’ Farmer’

                  Comment


                    #10
                    I love the pissed off bloke in his family - priceless.
                    James Philip Milner Fanclub #1

                    Curtis Julian Jones Fanclub #1

                    Comment

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