Armchair view
Tuesday May 22, 2007
The Guardian
ITV
ITV kicks off the evening's proceedings on digital wasteland channel ITV4 at 6pm with a hark back to some match or other held in Istanbul a couple of years ago, a programme presented by Matt Smith.
Once that is done, it is over to the Channel Formerly Known As ITV for coverage of the big match, presented by ITV1's second-most-famous presenting duo behind Ant and Dec, Steve Rider and his amazing non-moving hair.
Andy Townsend and Robbie Earle will be pitchside, dodging scarves and half-eaten pies from fans they are probably standing a bit too close for broadcasting comfort to. When it is all unfolding, Clive Tyldesley will be up in the commentary box no doubt be doing his level best to avoid starting sentences with his trademark phrase "That glorious night in . . ." - but probably failing dismally. You kind of love him for it, though, be honest.
Meanwhile David Pleat will be doling out his top-quality analysis, while touchline correspondent Gabriel Clarke will be hoping to get the post-match interviews in before Sky roving reporters Clare Tomlinson and Geoff Shreeves knack him in a pincer movement. The evening ends back on ITV34,781 as Jimbo Rosenthal looks back at Liverpool's first five European Cup victories, a programme guaranteed to get viewing figures of nil should the Reds lose.
Sky Sports
If you're seeking trenchant opinion on the evening's events you might have to turn to Sky Sports 1 for one reason: Graeme Souness.
That is because the former Liverpool captain spent last summer covering the World Cup for RTE in Ireland and, according to fellow panellist Eamon Dunphy, "he got a culture shock. He said: 'Jesus, you're telling the truth!' He got into it big time." A buoyant Souness has since taken some of that straight-talking sass back to Blighty and will not be afraid to tell it as he sees it.
Ruud Gullit, who won the European Cup with Milan, is equally unafraid to deviate from Sky's always positive party line, but professional nice guy Jamie Redknapp is on hand to provide some temperamental balance as Richard Keys tries to keep order in the studio.
On the commentary gantry Martin Tyler presides over affairs and Andy Gray offers interjections while hoping not to repeat his "ya beauuuttttyyyyy!" celebration when Steven Gerrard scores yet another European Cup screamer. As we know, the sidelines will be patrolled by Clare Tomlinson and Geoff Shreeves. It's a bit like there's a World Cup on, with all this channel rivalry and simulcasting, but at least we know England can't turn up and spoil the fun.
NB If you are digitally endowed and want to see how much make-up the studio guests have got on, flip over to Sky Sports HD1.
BBC Five Live
Five Live will be covering the game live via the medium of speech or, in the case of Alan Green, indignant blasts of white noise. Beforehand the Guardian's Nicky Campbell will be kicking off in Athens - not in a hot funk after one beer too many, we should stress; he is doing the breakfast show, where he will be gauging the mood among the Liverpool fans (who may or may not have had one beer too many). The big gig begins at 7pm, when Mark Saggers oversees proceedings with Green's co-commentator Mike Ingham and pundits Graham Taylor and Jan Molby. Once it is all over, Anita Anand will be hanging around Merseyside talking to people who are either dancing in fountains or suffering from mild manic depression.
Talksport
Talksport are not covering the game live but they are offering plenty of stuff around it. The day starts with the Ian Collins Show, which may or may not make for upbeat listening on account of the host being a Chelsea fan. Then it is the Alan Brazil Sports Breakfast, a title with euphemism written all over it. A few hours of barstool droning from Jon Gaunt paves the way for Hawksbee, Wrighty, and Champions Leaguey Finaly Nighty with Jasony Cundy. Of course the evening ends with the obligatory phone-in, from Athens.
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