Stock exchange opens in 6 minutes - it'll coincide with that.
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This will not be a disaster, Moyes keeps telling himself
NEW Manchester United manager David Moyes has spent the last 24 hours reassuring himself that this is not going to be an unmitigated catastrophe.
Following the official announcement of Sir Alex Ferguson’s retirement Moyes told friends that he felt like Roy Scheider in Jaws when the camera zooms in on him in that really weird way.
According to his friends, Moyes spent 14 hours in his toilet yesterday staring at himself in the mirror, practicing how to look as if he knows what he is doing.
One source said: “He keeps telling himself that Manchester United is the world’s biggest club run by clever people who make really important decisions every day.
“Which means they must have a very good reason for choosing someone who has never won anything. And so there’s nothing to worry about.
“And then he goes back into the toilet.”
Another friend said: “He’s had the words ‘it’ll be fine’ tattooed on to his left palm.
“Yesterday I had to tell him to stop staring at it or we were going to crash.”
The friend added: “He’s also written a poem for Robin van Persie. I told him he didn’t have to do that and then he started to cry.”
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Weak willed, Wank or do they have a masterplan?
Think we have the answer..Slot!!
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Official Everton @Everton
OFFICIAL: Everton can confirm that David Moyes will leave the Club at the end of the season. More on http://evertonfc.com . #EFCThanks very much for beingComment
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He's utterly bricking it
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I can't believe it. They've actually done itComment
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Moyes out.Adam Parsons @AdamParsons1 9m
This Facebook mistake would never have happened under Fergie. Moyes must go.
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Ferguson will be holding his hand for a few years I think. If he lasts that long.
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United Press Office - Hello David
Moyes - Hi, I've just jacked it at Everton so all good to go!!!
United - Ah.....yeah about that well SAF has changed his mind and is staying on so no hard feelings and all that
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The beeb:
On the ball as ever.Talks are still ongoing between Man Utd and Everton over release of David Moyes; Possible announcement may slip to FridayOh I don't know.Comment
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Hahahahaaaaa, Gollum is the Scum Manager.
"Its not about the long ball or the short ball, its about the right ball." Bob PaisleyComment
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Today has been a bonus to a good week to be a Liverpool fan.
The times they are a changin'.Comment
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