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    #136
    A redhead goes into the doctors and says that everywhere she touches hurts. The doctor asks her to show him. She touches her arm and screams, she touches her face and screams, she touches her leg and screams.

    Doctors says - you are not actually a redhead are you.
    Girl says - no I'm really blond, how did you know
    Doctor says - because your finger is broken

    Comment

      #137
      whats big and blue and ****s children???

      me and my lucky blue coat

      heard that yesterday
      "Sky and Setanta have the right to choose their games and it will be the same for everyone. So Mr Ferguson will not be complaining about fixtures and a campaign against United.

      "Or there is another option. That Mr Ferguson organises the fixtures in his office and sends it to us and everyone will know and cannot complain. That is simple."

      Comment

        #138
        What's black and screams?

        Stevie Wonder answering the iron

        Comment

          #139
          Why do these young girls wear training bras?

          If they asked me i'd teach them what their tits are for.
          "Through me the way into the suffering city,
          Through me the way to the eternal pain,
          Through me the way that runs among the lost.
          Justice urged on my high artificer;
          My maker was divine authority,
          The highest wisdom, and the primal love.
          Before me nothing but eternal things were made,
          And I endure eternally.
          Abandon every hope, ye who enter here."


          And like that… he's gone

          Comment

            #140
            whats the best thing about sex in the shower with an 8 year old????


            when her hair gets wet and you slick it back she only looks about 6
            "Sky and Setanta have the right to choose their games and it will be the same for everyone. So Mr Ferguson will not be complaining about fixtures and a campaign against United.

            "Or there is another option. That Mr Ferguson organises the fixtures in his office and sends it to us and everyone will know and cannot complain. That is simple."

            Comment

              #141
              a glaswegian estate agen thas denied that gary glitter is looking at houses in the city but he has confirmed there was a very public ****ing of some buoys yesterday

              Comment

                #142
                Whats blue and doesnt fit?








                A dead epiletic
                Always be yourself! Unless you can be Batman, then always be Batman.

                Comment

                  #143
                  Whats black and bumps into things???

                  Jordans baby Harvey!
                  You'll Never Walk Alone

                  Awoooga!!!!!!!!

                  Comment

                    #144
                    a witness watches on as a gang of 15 blokes chase a manure supporter through a pub car park, corner him, and kick the living **** out of him.

                    Later in court he is asked why he didn't do something to assist.

                    'Well to be quite honest I thought fifteen was probably enough'.

                    Comment

                      #145
                      Woman in labour, shouting and screaming as usual, "get this out of me, give me drugs".
                      She turns to the boyfriend and says "You did this to me you ****er ". He replied casually,
                      "If you remember, I wanted to stick it up your arse but you said, "**** off it'll be too painful",

                      Comment

                        #146
                        you are all invited to a big family BBQ at a mansion in shropshire


                        there will be plenty of beer



                        but sadly no fosters

                        Comment

                          #147
                          Since my wife died I no longer want to get out of bed in the morning.

                          Somebody has to keep her warm!
                          "Through me the way into the suffering city,
                          Through me the way to the eternal pain,
                          Through me the way that runs among the lost.
                          Justice urged on my high artificer;
                          My maker was divine authority,
                          The highest wisdom, and the primal love.
                          Before me nothing but eternal things were made,
                          And I endure eternally.
                          Abandon every hope, ye who enter here."


                          And like that… he's gone

                          Comment

                            #148
                            What is red and screams?

                            A peeled baby in a salt bath
                            Those that hid Anne Frank were breaking the law.
                            Those that killed her, were following the law.

                            Comment

                              #149
                              What do Gary Glitter and napalm have in common?


                              They can both strip the clothes off a vietnamese child in less than 2 seconds

                              Comment

                                #150
                                Whats the difference between Heath Ledger and Heath Ledger Jokes?

















                                Heath Ledger jokes can get old.

                                Comment

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