Crap Jokes

[wiw]

Absolutely appalling. I thought as a mod would know better

[wiw]

[Reaper]

I liked it Wiw. I dont care if people think its in bad taste, its the ****in truth

[wiw]

I liked it Wiw. I dont care if people think its in bad taste, its the ****in truth

I was joking

[kev776]

I went to see the nurse this morning for my annual check-up.
She said I had to stop w-anking.
When I asked why she said, "Because I'm trying to examine you!"

I just saw that Harry Potter film. A bit unrealistic if you ask me. I
mean, a ginger kid, with two friends?

A family is driving behind a garbage truck when a d!ldo flies out andt
thumps against the windscreen. Embarrassed, and to spare her young
son's innocence, the mother turns around and says, "Don't worry; that
was an insect."
To which, her son replies, "I'm surprised it could get off the ground
with a cock like that."

I had a mate who was suicidal. He was really depressed, so I pushed
him in front of a steam train.
He was chuffed to bits.

When I got divorced, my wife said she would fight for custody of the kids.
Took her out with one punch.

My granddad gave me some sound advice on his deathbed.
"It's worth spending money on good speakers," he told me.

A woman brings eight-year-old Johnny home and tells his mother that
he was caught playing doctors and nurses with Mary, her eight-year-old
daughter.
Johnny's mother says, "Let's not be too harsh on them.... they are
bound to be curious about 5ex at that age."
"Curious about 5ex?" replies Mary's mother. "He's taken her appendix out!"

I was walking in a cemetery this morning and seen a bloke hiding
behind a gravestone. I said "morning."
He replied, "No, just having a sh!t."

Disabled toilets. Ironically, the only toilets big enough to run around in.

I was reading in the paper today about this dwarf that got pick pocketed.
How could anyone stoop so low?

I was walking down the road when I saw an Afghan bloke standing on a
fifth floor balcony shaking a carpet.
I shouted up to him, "What's up Abdul, won't it start?"

[Will]

Guy phones in work sick, his boss ask how sick? the guy says, im in bed with my 12 year old sister.

[The Glove]

[lfcchris]

Rolf Harris has done the artwork for Michael Jackson's latest tour. As a thank you Jacko has promised to do two little boys at the end of each gig...

[lfcchris]

I found out today that my gran was in a porno film, I dont know what disgusted me more, the fact she made it or the fact I carried on wanking after I recognised her....

[Shanks]

I went to see the nurse this morning for my annual check-up.
She said I had to stop w-anking.
When I asked why she said, "Because I'm trying to examine you!"

I just saw that Harry Potter film. A bit unrealistic if you ask me. I
mean, a ginger kid, with two friends?

A family is driving behind a garbage truck when a d!ldo flies out andt
thumps against the windscreen. Embarrassed, and to spare her young
son's innocence, the mother turns around and says, "Don't worry; that
was an insect."
To which, her son replies, "I'm surprised it could get off the ground
with a cock like that."

I had a mate who was suicidal. He was really depressed, so I pushed
him in front of a steam train.
He was chuffed to bits.

When I got divorced, my wife said she would fight for custody of the kids.
Took her out with one punch.

My granddad gave me some sound advice on his deathbed.
"It's worth spending money on good speakers," he told me.

A woman brings eight-year-old Johnny home and tells his mother that
he was caught playing doctors and nurses with Mary, her eight-year-old
daughter.
Johnny's mother says, "Let's not be too harsh on them.... they are
bound to be curious about 5ex at that age."
"Curious about 5ex?" replies Mary's mother. "He's taken her appendix out!"

I was walking in a cemetery this morning and seen a bloke hiding
behind a gravestone. I said "morning."
He replied, "No, just having a sh!t."

Disabled toilets. Ironically, the only toilets big enough to run around in.

I was reading in the paper today about this dwarf that got pick pocketed.
How could anyone stoop so low?

I was walking down the road when I saw an Afghan bloke standing on a
fifth floor balcony shaking a carpet.
I shouted up to him, "What's up Abdul, won't it start?"

Mr J Carr?

[Reaper]

Stephen Hawking goes out on a date and returns only an hour later covered in ****in bruises.

When asked what happened, he replied: "she stood me up"

[Subby]

Hawkings....RIP

[Icon]

I hate myself for smiling at that!

[Nicey]

God there are some arseholes around

[Subby]

shoul really be in the bad taste jokes section....MODS PLEASE