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    Originally posted by lfcchris View Post
    A woman died of Diarrhoea today after having anal sex with 6 men in a vintage car. Police say it was a Pretty ****ty Gang Bang.

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      Paddy is passing by Mick's hay shed one day when through a gap in the door he sees Mick doing a slow and sensual striptease in front of an old red Massey Ferguson.

      Buttocks clenched he performs a slow pirouette and gently slides off first the right welly, followed by the left.

      He then hunches his shoulders forward and in a classic striptease move lets his braces fall down from his shoulders to dangle by his hips over his corduroy trousers.

      Grabbing both sides of his checked shirt, he rips it apart to reveal his tea stained vest underneath and with a final flourish he hurls his flat cap on to a pile of hay.

      "What the feck are you doing Mick" says Paddy.

      "Jeez Paddy, ye frightened the livin bejasus out of me, says an obviously embarrassed Mick, "but me and the Missus been having some trouble lately in the bedroom department, and the Therapist suggested I do something sexy to a tractor".
      Those that hid Anne Frank were breaking the law.
      Those that killed her, were following the law.

      Comment


        Originally posted by Chrono View Post
        Originally posted by Chrono View Post
        Originally posted by Shanks View Post
        ..





        Bill Oddie, Bill Oddie, put your hands all over my body.

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          Nine years of searching, 140 000 troops deployed, $125 billion spent and still the Americans can't manage to find a man who lives in a cave.

          No wonder Batman was so successful.
          "Through me the way into the suffering city,
          Through me the way to the eternal pain,
          Through me the way that runs among the lost.
          Justice urged on my high artificer;
          My maker was divine authority,
          The highest wisdom, and the primal love.
          Before me nothing but eternal things were made,
          And I endure eternally.
          Abandon every hope, ye who enter here."


          And like that… he's gone

          Comment


            My mates shagging twins who both like it up the arse...

            I said "How do you tell them apart??"

            He said "Easy! Sally's got long blonde hair...... and Dereks got a moustache"
            "Through me the way into the suffering city,
            Through me the way to the eternal pain,
            Through me the way that runs among the lost.
            Justice urged on my high artificer;
            My maker was divine authority,
            The highest wisdom, and the primal love.
            Before me nothing but eternal things were made,
            And I endure eternally.
            Abandon every hope, ye who enter here."


            And like that… he's gone

            Comment


              My wifes complained that I'm always pushing her around and talking behind her back.....


              What doers she expect she's in a ****ing wheelchair

              Comment


                A man goes to the doctor and the doctor says...

                "I have some bad news you have aids"

                "Oh dear" the patient replies

                "One other thing" the doctor says "You have Alzheimer's"

                "Could be worse" says the patient "I could have aids"

                Comment


                  Originally posted by JohnOK View Post
                  A man goes to the doctor and the doctor says...

                  "I have some bad news you have aids"

                  "Oh dear" the patient replies

                  "One other thing" the doctor says "You have Alzheimer's"

                  "Could be worse" says the patient "I could have aids"
                  bahahahahahaha .....slayed me that one
                  Cheers

                  Subby

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                    My daughter thought she was very funny by spelling out the word "cock" in her alphabetti spaghetti.

                    She soon ate her words.
                    When we hang the capitalists they will sell us the rope we use.

                    Comment


                      What's the difference between rape and murder?

                      My mood.

                      Comment


                        Elizabeth Fritzel has just tweeted that the Chilean miners are lightweight

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                          Cheryl Cole, Louis Walsh and Simon Cowell are walking along the street when Cheryl trips, falls forward and jams her head in some railings.

                          Simon, quick as a flash, pulls her knickers down and bangs her senseless from behind. Slapping her tight little arse he turns to Louis and says "Your turn".

                          Louis starts crying.

                          "What's wrong?", asks Simon.

                          Louis sobs "My head won't fit in the railings"

                          Thanks very much for being ‘This Mornings’ Farmer’

                          Comment


                            ....
                            Trey Nyoni: countdown to stardom- 2 years 1year 0.5 years

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                              John W Henry is considereing offering Roy Hodgson and extension to his current contract.
                              Jacques Brel is alive and well and playing at Anfield

                              Comment


                                Originally posted by 5europeancups View Post
                                john w henry is considereing offering roy hodgson and extension to his current contract.
                                lifetime ban deserved for that one!!!!

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