Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Crap Jokes

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

    Originally posted by The Reaper View Post
    On New Years Eve my girlfriend said to me, "as of tomorrow it will be a new year, a fresh start, where everything before will be forgotten."

    So I punched her in the face and shagged her sister.

    Comment


      Originally posted by Reggie View Post
      Can't really say anything different than that. It would be extremely OTT to filter through every joke and delete those that might cause offence to some sections of society.
      Also, if you have a problem with a post you really need to use the Report Post function as we can't be expected to read every post on here.
      I thought this was the bad taste jokes thread

      if anyone takes offence...then don't read the thread it's got the 18 only symbol for a reason

      ...not at you reggie...just hit your thread reply quote button
      Cheers

      Subby

      www.lewcose.com Diabetes technology to make life easier

      www.subbytech.com - Use your "est" discount code to get 15% off everything in the store too

      MetalliGear Neo Qube : Ryzen 7950x : x870 Tomahawk : 32GIG DDR5 6000Mhz : Sapphire 7900 : 850w G2 : CableMod custom cables : Win 11 : Subbytech.com

      Comment


        Originally posted by The Reaper View Post
        People can say what they like about the Gaza strikes, but that one he scored against Scotland was ****ing incredible.



        one of your verybest there mate

        quality
        Cheers

        Subby

        www.lewcose.com Diabetes technology to make life easier

        www.subbytech.com - Use your "est" discount code to get 15% off everything in the store too

        MetalliGear Neo Qube : Ryzen 7950x : x870 Tomahawk : 32GIG DDR5 6000Mhz : Sapphire 7900 : 850w G2 : CableMod custom cables : Win 11 : Subbytech.com

        Comment


          Why is everyone acting like being autistic is so bad? I wish I could draw.

          Comment




            I made a joke about dyslexia earlier this year

            Should have seen the posts of complaint I got..




            I couldnt understand a single ****in one of em
            "Through me the way into the suffering city,
            Through me the way to the eternal pain,
            Through me the way that runs among the lost.
            Justice urged on my high artificer;
            My maker was divine authority,
            The highest wisdom, and the primal love.
            Before me nothing but eternal things were made,
            And I endure eternally.
            Abandon every hope, ye who enter here."


            And like that… he's gone

            Comment


              So George Bush has been showing Barack Obama around the white house and giving him some advice before he becomes president




              Isn't that just like getting babysitting advice off Karen Matthews????
              "Through me the way into the suffering city,
              Through me the way to the eternal pain,
              Through me the way that runs among the lost.
              Justice urged on my high artificer;
              My maker was divine authority,
              The highest wisdom, and the primal love.
              Before me nothing but eternal things were made,
              And I endure eternally.
              Abandon every hope, ye who enter here."


              And like that… he's gone

              Comment


                My dog was eating grass in the garden this morning.

                My wife said, "grass is their medicine - it makes them sick".


                I'm not surprised - the lawn's covered in dog ****.
                "Through me the way into the suffering city,
                Through me the way to the eternal pain,
                Through me the way that runs among the lost.
                Justice urged on my high artificer;
                My maker was divine authority,
                The highest wisdom, and the primal love.
                Before me nothing but eternal things were made,
                And I endure eternally.
                Abandon every hope, ye who enter here."


                And like that… he's gone

                Comment


                  Which of the following doesn't belong?

                  (a) meat
                  (b) eggs
                  (c) wife
                  (d) blowjob


                  Answer: (d) a blowjob, because it's possible to beat your meat, your
                  eggs, or your wife, but you can't beat a blowjob.

                  Comment


                    Nicey isn't here yknow
                    Sack swinging like Dub-D40 on a door hinge

                    Comment


                      Originally posted by wiw View Post
                      Nicey isn't here yknow
                      who

                      Comment


                        Originally posted by elvoz View Post
                        Which of the following doesn't belong?

                        (a) meat
                        (b) eggs
                        (c) wife
                        (d) blowjob


                        Answer: (d) a blowjob, because it's possible to beat your meat, your
                        eggs, or your wife, but you can't beat a blowjob.
                        elvoz! staunch womens rights and anti-violence protestor by day...hypocrite by night

                        "These stories have as much relation to the truth as an egg to a chestnut." - Racing Santander President Francisco Pernia

                        Comment


                          "Through me the way into the suffering city,
                          Through me the way to the eternal pain,
                          Through me the way that runs among the lost.
                          Justice urged on my high artificer;
                          My maker was divine authority,
                          The highest wisdom, and the primal love.
                          Before me nothing but eternal things were made,
                          And I endure eternally.
                          Abandon every hope, ye who enter here."


                          And like that… he's gone

                          Comment


                            A hillbilly farmer who wanted to get a divorce paid avisit to a lawyer. The

                            lawyer said, 'How can I help you?' The farmer said, 'I want to get one of

                            them dayvorces.'

                            The lawyer said, 'Do you have any grounds?' The farmer said, 'Yes, I got 40

                            acres' The lawyer said, 'No, No, you don't understand, Do you have a suit?

                            The farmer said, 'Yes, I got a suit, I wears it to church on Sundays.' The

                            lawyer said, 'No, no, I mean, do you have a case?' The farmer said, 'No, I

                            ain't got a Case, but I got a John Deere. The lawyer said, 'No, I mean, do

                            you have a grudge?' The farmer said, 'Yes, I got a grudge, that's where I

                            parks the John Deere'. The lawyer said, 'Does your wife beat you up or

                            something?' The farmer said, 'No, we both get up at 4:30.'



                            By now the lawyer is getting frustrated but tries one last question ..The

                            lawyer said, 'Is your wife a nagger?' The farmer said, 'No, she's a little

                            white gal, but our last child was a nagger and that's why I wants a

                            dayvorce.'
                            --------------------------------------------------
                            Pen-pushing, desk-sucking, blotter-jotter

                            Comment


                              Just reminded me of South Park Wheel of Fortune..

                              So close to the knuckle im surprised they got it aired
                              "Through me the way into the suffering city,
                              Through me the way to the eternal pain,
                              Through me the way that runs among the lost.
                              Justice urged on my high artificer;
                              My maker was divine authority,
                              The highest wisdom, and the primal love.
                              Before me nothing but eternal things were made,
                              And I endure eternally.
                              Abandon every hope, ye who enter here."


                              And like that… he's gone

                              Comment


                                Originally posted by The Reaper View Post
                                Just reminded me of South Park Wheel of Fortune..

                                So close to the knuckle im surprised they got it aired

                                That was my exact thought as well. Still a funny episode.
                                --------------------------------------------------
                                Pen-pushing, desk-sucking, blotter-jotter

                                Comment

                                Working...
                                X