Crap Jokes

[Drago]

[Subby]

Took a dyslexic bird home last night, and she ended up cooking my sock!

lmao

sorry but I'm nabbing that one

[Drago]

The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist
threats and have therefore raised their security level from “Miffed” to
“Peeved.” Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to “Irritated”
or even “A Bit Cross.” The English have not been “A Bit Cross” since the blitz
in 1940 when tea supplies nearly ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorized
from “Tiresome” to “A Bloody Nuisance.” The last time the British issued a
“Bloody Nuisance” warning level was in 1588, when threatened by the Spanish
Armada.

The Scots have raised their threat level from “Pissed Off” to “Let’s get
the *******s.” They don’t have any other levels. This is the reason they have
been used on the front line of the British army for the last 300 years.

The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror
alert level from “Run” to “Hide.” The only two higher levels in France are
“Collaborate” and “Surrender.” The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that
destroyed France ‘s white flag factory, effectively paralyzing the country’s
military capability.

Italy has increased the alert level from “Shout Loudly and Excitedly” to
“Elaborate Military Posturing.” Two more levels remain: “Ineffective Combat
Operations” and “Change Sides.”

The Germans have increased their alert state from “Disdainful Arrogance”
to “Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs.” They also have two higher levels:
“Invade a Neighbor” and “Lose.”

Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual; the only
threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels .

The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy.
These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can
get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.

Australia , meanwhile, has raised its security level from “No worries”
to “She’ll be alright, Mate.” Three more escalation levels remain: “Crikey!”,
“I think we’ll need to cancel the barbie this weekend”, and “The barbie is
canceled.”

[JBOX]

The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist
threats and have therefore raised their security level from “Miffed” to
“Peeved.” Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to “Irritated”
or even “A Bit Cross.” The English have not been “A Bit Cross” since the blitz
in 1940 when tea supplies nearly ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorized
from “Tiresome” to “A Bloody Nuisance.” The last time the British issued a
“Bloody Nuisance” warning level was in 1588, when threatened by the Spanish
Armada.

The Scots have raised their threat level from “Pissed Off” to “Let’s get
the *******s.” They don’t have any other levels. This is the reason they have
been used on the front line of the British army for the last 300 years.

The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror
alert level from “Run” to “Hide.” The only two higher levels in France are
“Collaborate” and “Surrender.” The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that
destroyed France ‘s white flag factory, effectively paralyzing the country’s
military capability.

Italy has increased the alert level from “Shout Loudly and Excitedly” to
“Elaborate Military Posturing.” Two more levels remain: “Ineffective Combat
Operations” and “Change Sides.”

The Germans have increased their alert state from “Disdainful Arrogance”
to “Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs.” They also have two higher levels:
“Invade a Neighbor” and “Lose.”

Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual; the only
threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels .

The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy.
These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can
get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.

Australia , meanwhile, has raised its security level from “No worries”
to “She’ll be alright, Mate.” Three more escalation levels remain: “Crikey!”,
“I think we’ll need to cancel the barbie this weekend”, and “The barbie is
canceled.”

[RedAndWhite]

Italy has increased the alert level from “Shout Loudly and Excitedly” to
“Elaborate Military Posturing.” Two more levels remain: “Ineffective Combat
Operations” and “Change Sides.”

[Drago]

I hope that means you just don't think it's funny. Cause it really would take a special kind of idiot to click on Poor/bad taste jokes and get offended.

[5europeancups]

ach due liebe gott!! das ist nicht funnlich

[red evil kenevil]

I said to my missus"hey!fat bitch what do you want for your birthday"? she said dont get ****ing lippy"i said mascara it is then.

[red evil kenevil]

got an invite to a charity disco next week in aid of women born without any legs. apperantly the place will be crawling with fanny.

[red evil kenevil]

i was going through a couple of magazines the other night down at the local mosque ..........i was really enjoying myself till the fkn rifle jammed!

[red evil kenevil]

i think andy grey and richard keys should be sacked for there ignorant sexist remarkson tv sky sports should make an example and give there jobs to female presenters Preferably one with big tits

[red evil kenevil]

BBC NEWS FLASH: Woman slashed during sex attack"dirty bitch could of waited till he finished".

[red evil kenevil]

ITV NEWS FLASH:: Petrol stations are to play porn movies at the pump, so u can see someone else getting ****ed at the same time as you!

[red evil kenevil]

was in bed with a blind girl the other night she said i had the biggest penis she had ever laid hands on
i said "stop pulling my leg."

[wiw]

You seem familiar