Crap Jokes

[Stanbull]

Had a Valentine poem rejected by Moonpig.

I mean what's wrong with;

Roses are Red
Violets are twisted
Bend over love
You are about to get fisted ??

[RoadEnd]

in case you missed them last year and your stuck again this year on what to write, try these

Roses are stupid
Violets are silly
Grease up your flaps
Cos here comes my willy

Roses are crap
Violets are ****
Sit on my face
and wiggle a bit

Roses are red
Violets are finer
Chickens are fowl
just like your vagina

Roses are red
it's elementary
Let's call up a friend
and try double-entry

Roses are empty
Violets are hollow
Get it in your mouth, babe
And make sure you swallow

Roses make me laugh
Violets make me titter
You're a dirty bitch
And you love it up the ****ter

[Muddled]

Hours after Whitney Houston's death, Bobby Brown has been found dead in his hotel room.

He'd left a suicide note reading "two can play that game".

[kev776]

I saw this beautiful winter poem and thought it might be as much comfort to you as it was to me. Enjoy

"Winter" by Lily Jones Age 6, Norris Green



**** me.
It's cold!

From the heart, I'm sure

[Kenneth]

Just been admiring bigbustycoons.com

Those guys have really good bus companies.

[Muddled]

Just been admiring bigbustycoons.com

Those guys have really good bus companies.

[Stanbull]

BREAKING NEWS!!!! Luis Suarez has been arrested for the murder of Whitney Houston in a racially motivated attack. Eye witness Patrice Evra says he saw Suarez kill her at least 10 times. Sir Alex Ferguson has called for the death penalty.

Kenny Dalglish says he has never heard of Whitney Houston and has questioned wether she ever existed.

Howard Webb said he had seen it all

[Gray]

Went to my sex addicts class this morning.
My councilor thinks i've come a long way.
She believes this is because i no longer see women as mere sex objects and can appreciate them as equals..


sounds like she's after a shag if you ask me

[DaveMc68]

Whats six inches long and won't get sucked this Valentines Day?



Whitney Houstons crack pipe

[Gaz]

Just been admiring bigbustycoons.com

Those guys have really good bus companies.

[Gibbo]

Ah Pancake day.

The only day it's acceptable to toss with your children.

[Subby]

My 12 year old son was pissed off with me because I told him what happens in the film he was watching.

I was right though, he did cum on her face.

[fidget]

Picked up a midget prostitute last night.
Paid her £5 to go up on me.

[Glenn Hysen]

Knock Knock


Who's there


You


You who


Calm down gayboy

[Stanbull]

Anne Summers outlets are selling a new alcoholic vagina gel that women can rub on their flaps! So now when the guy goes down he can have a bevvy as well!
However anti-drink campaigners want it banned amid fears of 24 hour ***** drinking.