Crap Jokes

[labourRed]

What's the difference between black-eyed peas and chickpeas?

Black eyes peas could sing us a song whereas chickpeas could only hummus one.

[spud_gun]

My four year olds favourite joke is ..

Why did that banana go to the doctor?

Because it wasn’t peeling well

She tells me it about every other day on average.

[Buzzo]

My four year olds favourite joke is ..

Why did that banana go to the doctor?

Because it wasn’t peeling well

She tells me it about every other day on average.

Yeah, that’s a winner also

[Kenneth]

My four year olds favourite joke is ..

Why did that banana go to the doctor?

Because it wasn’t peeling well

She tells me it about every other day on average.

[Buzzo]

Smelly fairy joke wins for me

[spud_gun]

What do you call a lost wolf?

A Where Wolf

Where do Sharks go on holiday?

Fin-Land

How did the artist protect his castle?

Draw Bridge

What do you call a smelly Fairy

Stinker-Bell

Courtesy of my 7 year old son

[bacon]

My English Teacher said, "Your grammar is ****!"
I replied, "Your grandad is a cu*t!"

[tufty]

Two flies sat on a fresh dog turd

One of the flies does a very loud fart

The other fly says
"do you fukin mind, I'm eating me dinner!"

[Fosterbloke]

Why do Swedish warships have bar codes on them?

So they can scan de Navy in.

[brightred]

Somebody please tell a joke

[badpiggy]

been a while mate, various reasons

getting back up to speed, more ****e jokes to follow

Well I hope all is good with you now

It's been discovered that Ants are the only creature on Earth that appear to be immune to all forms of illness and viruses

Scientists say its down to them having little anti bodies

Brutal. Fully complies with thread title criteria

[Norbs]

Then it wouldn't funny would you plank!

[Fivex]

I’ve got a feeling people would still question it if Hambo said it out loud though.

[Mark79]

Its a good joke, but its a joke that wouldn't be subjected to this line of questioning if it had just been said out loud.

No, because we’d have assumed he said ‘kneaded’ and not ‘needed’!

[Alex]

Its a good joke, but its a joke that wouldn't be subjected to this line of questioning if it had just been said out loud.