Crap Jokes

[Slinky Skills]

I was watching TV when my girlfriend said, "I heard you wanking last night."

"Oh come on," I said, "Don't you ever, you know...?"

"Ever what?" she replied.

"You know..." I said, "Don't you ever, you know...?"

"Come on, say it. Don't I ever what?" she replied.

I said, "Don't you ever shut the **** up?"

[PTP]

Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and, with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

[wiw]

Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and, with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

So bad.

[McDermotX]

I was watching TV when my girlfriend said, "I heard you wanking last night."

"Oh come on," I said, "Don't you ever, you know...?"

"Ever what?" she replied.

"You know..." I said, "Don't you ever, you know...?"

"Come on, say it. Don't I ever what?" she replied.

I said, "Don't you ever shut the **** up?"

[McDermotX]

I went to a feminist picnic the other day.

It was great, apart from the fact that no one made any sandwiches.

[McDermotX]

Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and, with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

[EwarWoo]

[PTP]

[ChesterDave]

What's the difference between an Egg and Elliot Rodger?

An egg gets laid before it cracks.



Too soon?

[paulg]

My mate asked if I wanted to do a spit roast with him and his wife. As his wife is an absolute stunner, I said 'Yes'.
Although kneeling here with his cock up my arse and her strap-on in my mouth I feel something has gone terribly awry.

Slinky, is that you?

[baitman]

My mate asked if I wanted to do a spit roast with him and his wife. As his wife is an absolute stunner, I said 'Yes'.
Although kneeling here with his cock up my arse and her strap-on in my mouth I feel something has gone terribly awry.

im sure there is a confessions thread for this sort of thing... or there should be

[kev776]

My mate asked if I wanted to do a spit roast with him and his wife. As his wife is an absolute stunner, I said 'Yes'.
Although kneeling here with his cock up my arse and her strap-on in my mouth I feel something has gone terribly awry.

Don't give up the day job Frenchie.....

Well it was the Latin comment that triggered memories of old fashioned limericks.

[Tee]

Don't give up the day job Frenchie.....

There was a young man of Jaipur
Whose cock was shot off in the war.
So he painted the front
To resemble a cunt,
And set himself up as a whore.